


Swipe Right

by Violet_Janou



Series: Moments [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: AU, Fluff, London, M/M, Music Producer Louis, Sass, Teacher Harry Styles, dad jokes, dating apps, larry stylinson - Freeform, message format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-12
Updated: 2015-09-21
Packaged: 2018-04-20 11:48:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4786250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Violet_Janou/pseuds/Violet_Janou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A drunken night out on Halloween Louis wakes up to find that his mates have signed him up on a dating app on his phone, he was about to delete it when he sees there is massage for someone. Curious he opens it up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Jacq](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Jacq).



**Louis W. Tomlinson**    
_SassMaster28_

**Age** : 29  
**Location** : London Town  
**Intent** : Is looking for a relationship   
**Height** : 175cm (5' 9")  
**Profession** : Music Producer   
**Education** : Bachelors Degree  
**Do you have children** : No  
**Body Type** : Athletic (ish)  
**Personality** : Sass Master   
**Religion** : Non-religious   
**Smoker** : When stressed   
**Do you drink** : Socially   
**Hair** : Brown (all natural coloring)  
**Eyes** : Blue-ish, green-ish blue   
**Second Language** : French & sarcasm  
**Gender** : Male   
**Interested In** : Males  
**Talents** : I can cook a mean pot noodle & dodgeball

**Interests** : footie, music, travel, cooking, reading, movies, ice cream

**About me** :   
I'm 29 years old and looking for the right person in my life. I have a sassy facade but deep down inside I am a sensitive soul who loves to cuddle and watch movies with popcorn and coco. I work for Sony (and no I will not introduce you to a musician if you ask). I currently help manage my own label "Rover Records". I love and will forever cheer on my Doncaster Rovers. I love to have a good laugh and not take life too serious. I located to London when I came here for Uni and never left. I love to travel and have been to 11 different countries and 10 of the states in the U.S. I'm a chill person who would love to grab a pint and get to know the possible soon mister right. Message me if you are interested (;

\---

  
**H. Styles**  
_BananaBoy_

**Age** : 26  
**Location** : London  
**Intent** : Is looking for a relationship   
**Height** : 189cm (5' 11")  
**Profession** : Year 4 Teacher    
**Education** : Bachelors Degree  
**Do you have children** : No  
**Body Type** : Slender  
**Personality** : Adventurer   
**Religion** : Christian/Jewish  
**Smoker** : No  
**Do you drink** : Socially   
**Hair** : Brown & curly   
**Eyes** : Green  
**Second Language** : French   
**Gender** : Male   
I **nterested In** : Males  
**Talents** : I can sing & can play a mean game of scrabble

**Interests:** music, movies, traveling, cooking, reading, boxing

**About me:**    
Hello, I'm 26 years old and originally from Cheshire. I came to London for my work which is molding the minds of the youth through teaching. I'm a feminist, lover of all, some people say I study rainbows. I live for going to concert, seeing a good film or going to the theater. I'm very close with my family and would love to have one of my own at some point of my life. I'm shy but once I warm up to a person I'm outgoing and spontaneous. I'm not sure what else to write here so I'll end by saying I'm looking for something real, fun, and true to themselves.

Oh one more thing?

How many tickles does it take to get an octopus to laugh?? Ten-tickles! (Tentacles) 

\---

_BananaBoy has been matched with you_

_BananaBoy has sent you a message_

 


	2. II

**BananaBoy** :  
 _1 Nov 01:35_

Hi Louis,   
I was sending you a message for obvious reasons that I did swipe right and we were matched on this app. A little bit more about me than the awkward profile that is given, like I said before I grew up in Cheshire but have living in London since I was 20. I am a Year 4 teacher and love my job.... most of the days. I have a great class and I love to talk about them - my sister says to much but I could say the same when she talks about her cats. I was interested in your profile when you said you are a music producer, which I think is brilliant. I feel music is the best way to reach any type of person, and that it truly can heal the soul. I'm sure that you have gotten a lot of matches due to your pictures and your bio. I saw that you had a few tattoos on your arm and I was interested in them, I have a few myself (but I keep them hidden when I'm at work for professional reasons). I was curious about the stick figure on the skateboard and if there was some deep meaning, or a drunken mistake.... I have a few of those on me so no shame if it is.

I am looking for a relationship, I was in one that ended about a year ago and I need something healthy in my life unlike the last one. So please, if you are looking for a quick tap it and go don't message back. I'm on this site to please my mum (bless her soul but I'm not an old man yet) and that I am 26 and am looking for something serious and with working basically all year round (I do summer school classes as well) it's hard to be able to find someone and while I love to go out to the pub for a good pub quiz I'm not sure the man I want to be with I would meet at those things.

You seem like an interesting man and I would be honoured to get to know you a bit more with simple chatter before we decide, if we even decide to meet or exchange numbers. I hope that I didn't come on too strong, I have been on this app for long enough it's better to state what you want and don't then hope the other line can guess your mind.

Before I go, I have a parting joke for you

How much did it cost for the pirate to get his ears pierced? A buck an ear (:

Much Love

H. S

\---

_SassMaster28 is online_

_Message opened by SassMaster28 @ 17:35 on 1 Nov._

\---

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:00_

H,  
I'm sorry that it took so long to reply for a few reasons, the main one was I had no idea that I had a profile and thought my phone was broken. Come to find out my mates took it during a Halloween party and put me on this site.... app... whatever you call it as a joke. I am sorry that my profile gave you the wrong idea. You seem like a nice guy with a good head on your shoulders but as shitty as this sounds I'm not one for relationships. The last one I had was back in Uni which was back in the stone age. Thank you for commenting on my tattoos. I have about 15, some are more visible than others and no the stick figure wasn't a drunken decision. I mean it was but I wanted to be a skater so when I was 18 I drew this out and got it on my arm to remind myself to follow my dreams. But when you are 18 you don't realize being a skater is hard and you need money so I went into business and music. Not to come off as creepy but I looked at your pictures and I noticed you have a butterfly on your chest - is that your drunken tattoo mistake or another one? I honestly think the butterfly is fucking awesome and you should own it.

Again sorry for the confusion but when you get a bunch of old mates together, who had too much to drink on Halloween this is the shit that happens.

Tommo _._

P.S. That was actually a funny joke. Better than the ten tickles one (:

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

_Message opened by BananaBoy @ 18:30 on 1 Nov_

\---

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:32_

Thank you for your honest answer and I'm sorry to have bothered you with that silly long message. I feel like a tit now. No, actually the butterfly tattoo was added to my chest (painfully so) due to the fact that I have four nipples and wanted to cover up two of them... why I'm telling you this I have no idea but I'm already down the rabbit hole I guess. I have been looking into getting two birds on my collar bone - like large sized birds more so above my normal nipples... there I go again talking about nipples. I should stop now.

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:36_

You really have four nipples???? God that must have sucked as a kid! No I love the butterfly tattoo it seems to go with the long hair modern hippie vibe you have with your iced coffee and gold boots. I dig the bird idea. I have 'It is what is it' across my chest I'm assuming the same spot you would want the birds. Is there a specific bird you want or just whatever the artist does works for you??

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:40_

I want a sparrow of some sort but I want them to be a bit different, not not so much you can tell. Like if I'm at the beach or something people will be like 'oh cool birds' and then as they take another look they can see there is a slight difference in them. I know that sounds stupid

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:42_

No mate, that sounds awesome. I say go for it, I mean life it so short to wait on it, and plus if you're a teacher your students don't see your chest so why not ink it away? I know at work I usually have to keep my sleeves rolled down if I'm in meetings due to my ink, but when I'm just working at my chest I'm proud to show off and tell anyone who asks the mean (or lack of) each one has. I mean I have some dumbass ones I blame my mates for.

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:45_

Oh boy. Like what? I bet I could top you in stupid tattoos.

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:46_

I have a fucking tic tac toe game on my forearm. But it just has all X with a line through. Why I got it, we finished finals our first year of Uni and we got so pissed my mate and I that I thought I should get a doodle I drew on one of my class notes.

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:48_

I have like a wire hanger on my arm. I thought it looked cool and my sister got a matching one on her food and we both hate them. We got them in Spain when we went on holiday and our mum and step-dad went out one night and we were left to our own devices.

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:51_

Ouch. That's a good memory. My sisters hate the idea of getting something inked on them and they hate they I do.

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:51_

I also have the name of an old band I was in on my ankles. The band was shit and I played the piano and attempted to sing only to realize I couldn't carry a tune.

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:53_

But you are a music producer.....

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:53_

Oi watch it there boy! You don't need to be able to sing to know what good music sounds like and when someone has talent.

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:53_

What is the saying... those who can't teach. Or in your case produce?? Lol

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:54_

Okay smart arse, what is with the half naked cheap version of a sbux mermaid on your arm? 

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:55_

She is a beautiful lady of the sea and don't you dare tell her differently! 

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 18:55_

No, I wasn't sure why I got her but I did and I have grown to love and appreciate her more now that she is on my arm and that I have to look at her when I'm in short sleeves or in the shower or whenever she isn't covered. I was thinking of naming her, but then realized that was a bit sad and opted to keep my sanity for now.

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:57_

She is nice, a good topic starter for sure.

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 18:57_

Sorry again about the profile thing. I was going to delete it but I felt that I should reply back and not be a dick

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 19:00_

You wouldn't be the first one not to reply back. But thank you for your honesty. I mean, I know you said that you weren't looking for anything but I wouldn't mind if we chatted as friends - but if that is to odd.....

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 19:02_

No that would actually be cool! I'm actually going to keep the profile to fuck with people. Like respond with song lyrics, or movie quotes. I need something to occupy my time with so why not that Maybe I can be internet famous lol

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 19:03_

Have BuzzFeed do a story on it lol. Well I hope that you have fun messing with people and please let me know how it goes. I have to get off my phone, charge it and start making dinner to bring to a teacher who had surgery.

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 19:03_

What are you cooking? Also the interest that says I like to cook that should said eat. I'm not a big cook but I can make pot noodles and tacos. So if you ever want tacos, I'm your guy lol.

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 19:05_

So next taco Tuesday I expect tacos! I'm making lasagna with some garlic bread and Caesar salad and then bananas chocolate chip nut bread for dessert

**SassMaster28**   
_1 Nov 19:05_

So when can I come over and eat that? I kid... but not really. You go and be domestic and I will be just as domestic with curing my hangover with Nando's and coffee

**BananaBoy**   
_1 Nov 19:05_

Talk to you soon

\---

_SassMaster28 is offline_

_BananaBoy is offline_


	3. III

_SassMaster 28 is online_

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_BananaBoy is online_

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**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:15_

Okay. I need to vent. I love my students. I love them and I will say it over and over again until I believe it because I do but good lord, Allah, and Buddha they drove me so far up a wall today I snapped. I snapped. I never snap. Why I snapped… that’s a good question I’m sure you are going to ask as you read this. One of my students brought his pet tarantula. Yes, the nasty eight legged beast of a spider to class as show and tell. Fine. Okay. But then I’m teaching the maths lesson and I hear a few girls and boys crying out in fear. I turned around and saw that the student was holding an empty container where his evil beast named Peter lived. Oh, I should mention I have a phobia. Not a fear, but an actual phobia of those things and while I was remaining calm on the outside I was dying. No… I actually died on the inside. So while students were climbing onto their desks, the poor student crying over his spider I was standing there as the thin WAS CRAWLING UP MY BLOODY TROUSERS! Thankfully a student ran and got another teacher who got the spider off of me before I passed out. We then had Peter go and wait in the front office till the end of school and I sent a nice email to the students mum. BUT on top of that (Oh yes there is more). I then had students telling me that they got bitten by the damn thing and needed to go home and it was so bad that half the class was claiming they were seeing things and needed to lie down. I gave up on maths and I had them sit there and do homework while I got the nurse and she told them there was nothing to worry about and when they went to lunch I might have had a mental break down at my desk over my lunch. So now I’m sitting on my large sofa, with a large glass or Merlot catching up on my telly shows and thankfully we have a day off tomorrow and I’m not even sure why but I’m not asking.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:25_

I give it to the kid for naming the spider after well Spider-Man. Brilliant I tell you :p But on a serious note…. spiders freak you out that much? What do you do if you get one in your flat??

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:25_

I put a cup over it and tape it to the floor and then call the little boy who lives below me to take it for his collection. Or I call my sister. She hates me when I do, but I actually can’t move when I see them my entire body shuts down and I feel as if I’m going to die.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:26_

Noted. No spiders for BananaBoy. Don’t worry I had a shit day to. I had a major concert deal fall through for one of my artist which had them pissed at me. So I’m sitting on my couch, two beers in and a spoonful of Nutella to finish off as my oh so healthy dinner as a grown adult.

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:28_

Sorry about the deal :/ I’m sure that there is a better one around the corner or you will figure something out. I mean you are 29 and have your own label that takes balls, a back bone and a lot of skill.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:28_

Or a lot of dumb luck. Thanks though. I will be fine. I’m just happy tomorrow is Friday. I gave myself a nice long weekend to go camping with my mates.

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:30_

Same mates who made this profile for you?

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:30_

Those same twats. They mean well. We started this tradition when we were back in Uni… I go for the beer, crap food and to build a fire. Well to be honest I’m usually the one who is walking around acting like I’m doing shit but I’m waiting for everyone else to do it and then I take the prime seat around the bonfire and enjoy my night.

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:32_

Hahahaha! You are that person. I’ve never been camping with friends. I’ve gone hiking and I love that but camping I’ve never done.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:32_

It’s fun if you go with the right people. My name Niall usually brings his guitar and we sing around the campfire (or attempt in my case). But I will be one with nature for a few days, I’ve turned off all communication with work and unless the record label is going bankrupt my assistant Jayme knows not to bother me.

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:34_

I will note that when my messages go unanswered lol

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:35_

No I will have my mobile on I just turned it off for work, feel free to message me.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:36_

Do you have any fun plans this weekend or is it going to be you and your telly??

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:38_

No. I have my mum and step dads anniversary party back in Cheshire so I will be leaving tomorrow in the early hours of morning to head back home, thankfully my sister will be keeping me company in the car. I’m not a fan of these parties for I get the same questions about my personal life and as much as I love all my mum and step dad’s friends and family having them tell me I need to find someone doesn’t help.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:40_

Wow, are you sure you aren’t at my mum and dad’s house and having them lecture me? The worst is my one younger sister is already married and they are expecting their first kid and here I am 29 - almost 30 and single.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:41_

You can message me if you are swamped with horrible questions if you need an escape. I might be sending you a smoke message to save me from this camping trip. My one mate just broke up with his fiance and it’s been ugly…. and I love him but I can only stand so many stories about him and her before I want to bash my beautiful face into a wall.

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:45_

We wouldn’t want that. Okay deal (: Thank you for being a life saver I’m sure I would have just drank until my face was numb and I started to talk about my ex. Always a funny Harry to be around.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 19:46_

So that’s your name, Harry. I thought it was much worse since you didn’t use it in your profile.

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 19:49_

Lol. Nope it’s just Harry.

**SassMaster28**   
_12 Nov 20:00_

That’s a good name. Well Harry I need to get packed before tomorrow and try and see if I need to go out and get a tent of if someone has one for me. Safe travels to Cheshire. Look forward to hearing from you soon.

**BananaBoy**   
_12 Nov 20:10_

 

Enjoy camping! Don’t get eaten by a bear.

\---

_SassMaster28 is offline_

_BananaBoy is offline_

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_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_13 Nov 12:05_

I have been home for fifteen minutes and my aunt asked me when I was going to get married. Lord give me strength for this weekend.

\---

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_13 Nov 14:17_

I’m sorry mate! Go and hide out someplace. We made it to the camping area, set up and had Oli sobbing to me about his ex and I was tempted to leave him on the side of the road as we drove up here. But alas didn’t. He has had several beers and finally shut up. How are things on the home front there??

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_13 Nov 16:45_

Okay. Dinner was a bit weird with my step dad’s sister. She is a bit how shall we say not to excited that I’m gay. So I got a nice indirect lecture on my sinful ways. But I’m going out for drinks with a childhood friend so hopefully things will pick up. Maybe I will find a cute face to snog with (:

**BananaBoy**   
_13 Nov 16:45_

Keep safe of bears.

**BananaBoy**   
_13 Nov 16:45_

How did you catch a fish without a fishing pole? With your bear hands (:

\---

_SassMaster28 is online_

_BananaBoy is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_13 Nov 23:00_

1) The only bears in England are the ones in the bloody zoo you weirdo  
2) That joke did make me laugh a bit.

**BananaBoy**   
_13 Nov 23:00_

You never know?!?! Also might have had a bit to much. to much to drink.

**SassMaster28**   
_13 Nov 23:00_

Oh, little Hazza is already drunk messaging me. I feel we just upped our level from acquaintances to close friends!

**BananaBoy**   
_13 Nov 23:15_

Awwww. I have a nickname! Thanks(:(:(:(:

**SassMaster28**   
_13 Nov 23:16_

Let me know when you are home. I know you are a bit wasted but I don’t want to wake up and find out you were hit by a car walking home or some shit like that. And you must be hella one happy drunk to message me that many smiley faces.

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 00:02_

I’m home Louis (: Have fun camping. Don’t get eaten by a bear. I would be sad ):

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 00:05_

Make sure to drink water before bed and when you wake up take some asprin and chug a few glasses of water. Goodnight Harry.

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_SassMaster is offline_

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_SassMaster is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 09:45_

I hope you are feeling just as you did last night Harry! I’m taking it you had fun with your old friend? Well I’m off to go and hike with Niall while Oli stays back and cries about his ex with Jonah. I refused to listen to it anymore and Niall was about to lose it - and he is the one who never gets annoyed and is always laughing. Drink lots of water and shove McDonald’s down your face. You have an anniversary party to attend to (: And yes, I’m being a giant tit now and laughing at you.

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 17:00_

I’m slightly dead. I did drink water and thank you for the words of encouragement for me you twat. I hope the hike was good and you didn’t fall down a cliff. Now that I’ve gotten my anger off my chest I can safely say that I’m never drinking that much again. I’m also never. And I repeat NEVER going to be hungover at a party my mum and step father have. It was all the family and the same questions but the worse was from Gemma, she is 28 and single and has a great job as a journalist and my aunt asked her when she was going to settle down and be a woman. Oh lord I’ve never seen her so upset and leave a room not to ruin the party.

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 17:25_

I’ve decided to be the weirdo who sits at a table with sunglasses on and talks with the kids because they seem to enjoy life more than the adults. Oh - but my mum and stepdad want a family picture, which we haven’t done in years so this should be interesting. I love my mum, and I don’t mind a picture now and then but her sister and make a big deal about having it done and she made me and Gemma change so we looked more presentable. I mean I was in nice skinny jeans, and a nice white button up shirt. How is that not acceptable for a photograph? So I changed into a black button up and black boots - and brushed my hair. Hope camping it good and you haven’t killed Oli. I don’t have enough money to post bail. Sorry.

\---

_SassMaster28 is online_

_BananaBoy is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:00_

How was the family photo shoot? Sorry we went swimming in his lake and nearly froze my balls off. But we are by a fire now. Oli is on the phone with his ex in the car. I’m enjoying coffee and a s’more which is a beautiful creation that everyone should eat daily.

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 18:03_

That sounds amazing. i just ate my bodyweight in cake and coffee. Thankfully the hangover is gone, Gemma is back to being her normal happy self and all is right in the Twist-Styles house. How is camping? I’ve been thinking I should go with some mates. Lay under the stars and be one with nature

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:05_

Okay Hazza the Hippie. I can see you laying in the grass with a spliff in your hand solving the worlds problems lol

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 18:06_

Don’t knock it till you try it.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:10_

YESSS! Oh god we should go camping we would have a smashing time lol. And you will be happy to know I haven’t been eaten by a bear yet (:

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 18:12_

Haha.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:15_

So you have a sister? No brothers?

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 18:18_

Nope. Just me and Gemma. You have a sister?

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:22_

I have two younger sisters and then a nephew on the way. My mum didn’t want to risk having another girl so she stopped lol. They all still live in Doncaster. My sister who is married lives in York. Not to far from my mum and dad. I’m the black sheep of the family. Single. Career driven. Lives in London. Gay.

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 18:30_

Yeah I love home but there was nothing for me. I didn’t want to teach at the school I went to. I wanted to be in a city that had a pulse and felt that I could be someone but then I could be no one if I wanted to. It’s weird and I should stop

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:32_

No. I understand what you are saying. Don’t feel the need to stop ever. I think it’s great how you look at the world in a different way. I’m sure that you are the teacher who will leave a lasting impact on the students even when they are 50 and running the country.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:32_

Mobile is about to die. I will charge it in the car. Doing some more hiking tomorrow if the rain doesn’t come in but if it does we are packing up and heading back home and just spend the Sunday in a pub watching footie.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Nov 18:32_

Have a good night Hazza. Talk to you in the morning

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_SassMaster28 is offline_

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Nov 18:40_

Have good night Louis. Be careful of bears (:

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 _BananaBoy is offline_   

 


	4. IV

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_29 Nov 20:00_

Ouch. Sorry about the footie match. I didn't catch it but my mate told me that Doncaster got walloped.

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_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_29 Nov 22:00_

I'm not drunk enough to talk about how pathetic we played. I am ashamed for them and myself. I deserved to be laughed at, and pointed as if I was some freak as I walk down the streets. *hangs head* excuse me while I drown my sorrows with a bottle of Whiskey and a pack of smokes.

**BananaBoy**   
_29 Nov 22:15_

Don't kill your liver - or your lungs and heart. Please.

**BananaBoy**   
_29 Nov 22:16_

I'm sure people won't laugh at you and it wasn't that bad.... was it? They will have next year. Maybe you should just go and join the team and show them how to play properly lol.

**SassMaster28**   
_29 Nov 22:56_

I won't - I have to be functioning adult tomorrow and so I was only kidding about the drinking. I did smoke too much but it was all the stress. Yes, I should get my arse back to Donnie and show them how to play a proper match. Jesus it was ugly. I don't want to talk about it. That's how ugly it was.

**SassMaster28**   
_29 Nov 23:00_

I'm sure you are asleep by now but are still showing that you are online. I'm off to bed. Work calls and I have a nice day ahead of me playing booking agent for venues around England and Ireland for a band. Have a great day tomorrow Harry, and don't let the kids drive you mental. Just think it's almost winter holiday!

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_BananaBoy is offline_

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_BananaBoy is online_

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:05_

Someone is not teaching. Bad teacher (;

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:05_

I'm on lunch if you must know. And what about you??? Shouldn't you be producing something?

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:08_

Someone is feisty today! What is wrong?

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:10_

I got a match on this app.

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:10_

That's good! Who is the lucky bloke who wants to wine and dine the fine school teacher?

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:13_

Not funny. I'm not sure I should go. My mate Xander told me to stop waiting and to go and if it sucks then you don't see him again. But... confession, I haven't been on a date since my last relationship ended. I'm not sure I remember how to act or what to do.

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:15_

As a third party who wants the best for you, go. I mean if he is like a mime or some weird shit like that then no, don't go. But I'm sure that you will have a good time. Plus it's a free meal and booze no? I can't tell you when the last time I went out on a date was and I'm pretty sure it was ugly and messy.

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:16_

Be you. As weird and cliche as it sounds, and is to say that is all you can be right? When does he want to go out?

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:18_

Sunday for brunch. Who does that??? Me. I would do that. But. God, I'm over thinking and starting to get hives from panicking. See, this is why I'm not in a relationship. I'm a single teacher who lives alone with his cat. I'm a cat man.

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:20_

Oi stop! Go on the bloody date. And if the brunch date is shit message me and I will bail you out (: But go and don't over think. I don't need you in hospital for scratching your skin raw.

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:20_

Okay..... but if he kills me I'm leaving a note blaming you and Xander.

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:23_

Whatever helps you sleep at night and go on this date mate (: How is class going?

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:25_

Good, the kids are excited to audition for The Nativity play, which I got ropped into helping with so let's all hope I have sanity and Christmas joy by the time I'm on break lol. How are things going with messing with people on the app?

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:26_

AH-FUCKING-MAZING. I have used Backstreet Boys song lyrics on a guy and he had no idea, then I started to quote Atonement and they blocked me. Now I'm talking to his guy and I'm trying to decide if I want to use Taylor Swift song lyrics of Florence.....

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:38_

Florence all the way and why would someone block when you were quoting Atonement!?! I would drop my pants and let them have their way with me if they told me they would return, find me, love me and marry me without shame.

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:30_

Apparently it was creepy.... I think the film is one of the most romantic films out there and the book just tore me apart when I read it both times.

**BananaBoy**   
_3 Dec 13:30_

God that movie is in my top five films of all times along with Love Actually. I have to get off this and go back to teaching young minds. And internally freaking out over this date.

**SassMaster28**   
_3 Dec 13:31_

You will be fine Harry. Trust me

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**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 09:50_

Kick ass on the date & remember if you need to get out just send me a message (:

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_BananaBoy is online_

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**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:00_

No my date didn't just end. I went over to my sisters after and talked with her about it and then ended up passing out on her couch as she did work. The date was. Okay. He was nice, smart and we had a good conversation about politics, global issues, celebrity gossip, talked about our favorite books, movies, funny stories. The conversation flowed and it wasn't awkward like I feared that it would be. the food was good to - which doesn't shock me I love breakfast food. I could eat breakfast food all day long and be the happiest man on the planet.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:06_

But......

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:07_

Well he didn't like my jokes.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:08_

GASP! What ones did you tell him?

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:10_

What did the nut say when it sneezed? Cashew.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:10_

BAHAHA. That's actually funny. His loss. What else was wrong for you won't have given the nice monologue when you logged on if there wasn't something else.

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:11_

He walked me to my car and got all touchy. I'm all about PDA but you don't know me, don't put your hand on my ass and don't stick your tongue down my throat. So I told him this wasn't going to work and then left and went to Gemma's. I'm not upset, I had a good meal and will go back to the restaurant I just know I don't want that. So I'm back to square one. Yay.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:15_

There is someone out there for you, you are too young to give up on love. But hey you have me to chat with while you still and try and chat up the next hottie lol

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:20_

Until then my life will be focused on teaching and this Nativity play which is a joke. JOKE. The kids are amazing, and some not so much but they are all having a good time it's the teachers that are driving me mental. Like it's a bloody play put on at a primary school not West End calm your knickers. One teacher, has been at this school I swear since Jesus walked the earth told his poor girl that she sounded like a dying cat. Who says that to a child? A mean grumpy old man that is who.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:23_

Jesus..... maybe he should retire or think about his life and that he is being a jerk. I better hear some play by plays of practice and a few videos for a good chuckle. I remember I was Joseph one year and my mum was so excited she cried. I was so terrified, but I did it and I'm still alive!

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:25_

I'm grateful for that (: So what did you do on this mellow weathered Sunday?

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:26_

My mate and his wife had a wedding today so I have there twins with me. We built a fork in my living room, got our light sabers and have been watching Star Wars and having battles, ate Nando's and had some ice cream as dessert.

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:28_

Are they Jedi or Sith

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:30_

Emma is the Sith of the family. A girl after her uncle's heart and then Isaac is the Jedi. Hold on let me send you some pictures.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:31_

*picture sent*  
*picture sent*  
*picture sent*

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:34_

I love how you hung the tent from the ceiling. Very clever and they went all out with the costumes and all. You get an A+ in my book for Uncle of the Year. I honestly don't think I've seen kids that happy before. And I liked the cameo of your foot in the picture as well lol.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:35_

I love these two. It makes me want to have some of my own, but I said if I don't find someone by the time I'm 35 I' going to just adopt. I've wanted to be a dad since I could remember so why not. I have the income to support a child and I would be able to work my hours around them and work from home as well.

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:36_

I think that is what scares most men on this app. I want a family. I want three to four kids and the house to be chaos at times but to be filled with love and laughter and memories. Now I'm starting to sound like a horrible romance novel. lol

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:40_

If wanting a family is scary then those people can go fuck off. Family is something so amazing and the fact that kids can open your eyes when you become so stuck in your ways. I'm sure you will find Mr. Right H. You are 26 you have time!

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:43_

Yes and no. But it's nice to know there are men out there who want a family. I don't feel like this weird abnormality anymore in the human race.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:46_

We can be abnormalities together (:

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:47_

I am surprisingly okay with that lol.

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:50_

Now we have moved to popcorn and jelly babies. I am winning as Uncle of the Year! We are now on the final film (I refuse to watch the poor excuse of the newer ones). But I promised I would take them to see the new film for Christmas before I head home to Donnie.

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:53_

Oh I agree with you on those films, and how nice! Santa should be good to you this year with gifts (: Oh! Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road??

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 15:55_

Why.....

**BananaBoy**   
_6 Dec 15:56_

to get to the dark side! bahahaha!

**SassMaster28**   
_6 Dec 16:00_

Don't give up on your day job (: I should get back to focusing on the children at hand. I will be on later! 

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**BananaBoy**   _(Draft_ )  
 _6 Dec 16:00_

I look forward to it.

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for everyone who has bookmarked the fic, left kudos and read (: It means a lot to me and I will update it as much as I can it takes a long time to have to go through and bold everything since that doesn't copy over from a google doc...... stupid. I know. 
> 
> XO  
> Vi


	5. V

_BananaBoy is online_

_SassMaster28 is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 16:26_

Can you save me from this play? The girl who was playing Mary has mono and the girl the other two teachers picked has the biggest stage fright and wants to quit. They don’t listen to anything I have to say and I just want to go home to my cat and a nice cuppa. But I sit here in my trousers, jumper and boots. Send. Help. Save. Me.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 16:26_

Lord I’m sorry! I’m stuck in my office in a stuffy oxford shirt tucked into my dress trousers and shiny shoes trying to get work done that should have been done but the intern fucked up so bad that I want to punch a bloody wall! So I shall sit at my desk until everything is done right, and I can reissue the concert venues for a band as well as re release a statement for when an EP is dropping and pray to the love of god that I can still get them on the morning radio show to do an acoustic set but lord knows if I can. RAWR

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 16:28_

:/ Sorry. What did the intern do?

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 16:28_

Mark.

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 16:30_

o_O

**SassMaster28**

_14 Dec 16:31_

Yeah. So it was a bloody fun day in the office. It’s okay I will have Niall grab us Nando’s for dinner as we clean up this shit, and also prep in case she tries to take legal action for us finding her redundant. Anyway how is Mr. Evil teacher?

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 16:33_

Evil. He mad a kid cry today. Why, because he missed his cue and I had to talk to him but he told me that I was young and still had a soul but soon the kids would take that from me and I would be just like him. I will never be like that bitter man. I will never, and if I somehow get there please save me, slap me, and give me the biggest reality check until I’m back to me. I have ten more days of this nonsense and I will be home for the holiday, enjoying snow, cocoa, a warm fire and all the festivities there are for Christmas.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 16:36_

Can he be found redundant? I’m sure you have a case.

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 16:37_

I wish. Oh how I wish.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 16:40_

Yeah, we are closing up shop here on the 22, giving everyone the Holiday off. I was gong to stay in London and then drive to Donnie on Christmas but my mum was throwing a fit about me missing my birthday with the family

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 16:41_

When is your birthday?

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 16:42_

Christmas Eve. I’m turning 30 so it’s not something I would want to celebrate. I will end up getting a pint with some mates when I get back in town but my mum wants me home with my sisters and I understand that so I will listen like a good son. Plus, I will beat the traffic that will be on the M1.

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 16:45_

YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY YOUR BIRTHDAY WAS CHRISTMAS EVE!?!?! You make me feel horrible and I would have looked like a tit talking to you and not realizing it was your big day. You should be ashamed of yourself Louis. Ashamed.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 16:48_

I slapped my wrist as punishment lol. It’s nothing really. I was never a fan of birthdays but my mum always makes me favorite meal, I get a few gifts and then we would go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to arrive. It will be the same this year only I’ll stay up and watch It’s a Wonderful Life and pass out on the couch. Then we have family over, a few nieces and nephews, have a massive meal and then all nap before waking up and having more food and play out in the snow.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 16:49_

What are you traditions?

**BananaBoy**   
_14 Dec 17:00_

Well Gemma and I will head up on the 23rd and have Christmas eve with my mum and step-dad and then we go to his side of the family for Christmas where we have food, desserts, presents, and his sister plays the ‘my children are better than you and here is why’ game which is fun. Gemma and I usually sing drunk carols. My Uncle gets beyond pissed and then that is our cue to leave. Then boxing day we spend it with my mum’s side of the family which is more quiet for her sister isn’t there. I prefer my mums side over my step-dads but that is life.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 17:05_

That sounds nice, your family seems like a lot of fun. Doing anything else on your holiday?

**BananaBoy**

_14 Dec 17:06_

No. Nothing set in stone, I’m sure I will go out with mates for dinner, clean my flat which is much needed, I need to get some cookies made to give to the teachers and students before the holiday is up so that will be my weekend to be honest. Baking and listening to the Josh Groban Christmas album.

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 17:10_

Again with the cooking, you need to send some of those goodies my way kind sir lol

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 17:11_

Shit, the lawyer is calling, I better take this and get everything squared away legally so the intern won’t come and back try and ruin me for ruining her (so she put it when she left via security).

**SassMaster28**   
_14 Dec 17:12_

Also tell professor evil to smile and be happy it’s bloody Christmas time!

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_BananaBoy is offline_

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**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:00_

I never asked. Why is your username BananaBoy?

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:00_

I like Banana’s lol. No it’s a nickname my nephew gave me when he saw me eating a banana one time when I was at his house. It stuck and I had no idea what to use lol. What does the 28 represent?

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:02_

Oh, my jersey number when I played footie back in the day when I was in school. SassMaster… well I am called the Sass Master from Doncaster.

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:05_

Was that a nickname you gave yourself? lol

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:06_

Watch it BannaBoy.

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:10_

Oh, I did it today. I got the tattoo. It hurts like a mother.

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:10_

Am I going to have to imagine it or are you going to be kind enough to share a photo?

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:11_

*picture attached*

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:12_

Very nice! Do they have eyebrows?

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:13_

No…. fuck they do. lol

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:15_

They so fucking do. You know birds don’t have eyebrows right….

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:16_

Shove it.

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:18_

I like it. All joking aside for this moment, I like the bird, they fit with the butterfly and the letters on your collar bone. I’ve been thinking about getting a little triangle on the back of my ankle by the heel of my foot.

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:20_

That sounds cool. Simple, would fit well with your aesthetic very well. I don't know why I decided to go tonight but my mate got one done and I just decided why not, and not I’m in so much pain. I have such a low pain tolerance but it’s an addiction. It also helped get my mind off today. Professor Evil is no longer helping with The Nativity (I think I hear angels singing) but we got this new teacher, and she has been flirting with me and I’ve given her the hint that I’m not interested. I even told her today that i was gay.

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:21_

Oh lord, don’t tell me she said that she could make your straight. I had that line pulled on me while in Uni and I laughed at them. Laughed in the poor girls face I still remember her name. Judith.

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:25_

Yes, she did. So I just shook my head and left. But the kids sounds really good. I have a video, if you want to see. I mean that is stupid, you don’t need to see it

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:26_

Send it (: I’m making my mate Liam record Emma and Issac in their Nativity play since I will be back home.

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:28_

*video attached*

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:30_

If you ever want to leave teaching I will sign you with Rover Records (:

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:33_

Haha. Very funny.

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:35_

I’m serious, you have a unique voice and it’s really good. I don’t lie about this to anyone.

**BananaBoy**   
_18 Dec 21:36_

Well thank you. Now I can go to bed with my ego inflated. I have rehearsal bright and early and then cookie making and dinner with friends. Get much needed sleep, and relax now that you got everything settled. Also the band you signed, the all girls one is kick ass. Love their music, might have gotten both EP’s today on iTunes

**SassMaster28**   
_18 Dec 21:37_

I will send you a fruit basket as a thank you (: and you have fun with the kids and teachers tomorrow.

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**SassMaster28**   
_21 Dec 07:35_

I walk into my office and Jayme has this smile on her face and I’m confused as why, I then see Niall standing by my office his eyes as big as saucers and then I walk into my office and see balloons, flowers, and a basket of tea, sweet treats, and someone’s homemade Christmas cookies with a card. But on top of that was a gift card to my favorite store for more than was needed. So I wanted to thank you, it was - it brought me back. I haven’t had a surprise like that on my birthday week in a long time. Also, did you hand deliver it? I asked Jayme and she said some tall lanky man who kind of looked like a baby giraffe came in and put it on my desk. So, I want to thank my giraffe.

_SassMaster28 if offline_

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_SassMaster28 is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_21 Dec 20:00_

Yes, I was the baby giraffe that snuck into your office. I know that could come off as creepy and I was told how creepy it was thanks to Gemma but I wanted to do something for you birthday. It’s a day that should be about you and well I can’t stop myself. I have this impulse to give birthday gifts and cards. I hope that it made your last day before holiday a bit better. Thankfully we have no practice today for The Nativity. I have to finish the small gifts for the students, and pack for Cheshire since I leave 7 am on the 24th with Gemma. Thankfully The Nativity is on the 23rd.

**SassMaster28**   
_21 Dec 20:05_

Those cookies rocked my world Harry. I ate the all before I came home, I might have gotten sick from eating them all - well I didn’t eat them all, Niall helped me with most of them but you have a way with baking and that was the best gift ever. I also enjoyed the card with Bananas on them and the jokes, I told them to the staff and they all thought I had lost it, but I was in the Holiday spirit. Thank you again, maybe I will pop by your school before you get in and give you a thank you note… you never know.

**BananaBoy**   
_21 Dec 20:08_

It was your birthday now stop thanking me Lou. What time do you take off tomorrow?

**SassMaster28**   
_21 Dec 20:10_

Early. I’m already in bed but my mind is still going. So is life lol. Niall asked if I had a secret boyfriend and I told him no it was just from a friend name Harold. He didn’t ask any more questions which shocked me. So if you get a random Facebook request from a Niall bottle blonde Irish man I’m deeply sorry.

**BananaBoy**   
_21 Dec 20:12_

Lol, okay noted (: I’m about to fall asleep myself. Long day and an even longer one tomorrow. Have a safe trip and know if you need an escape you can always message me.

**SassMaster28**   
_21 Dec 20:15_

I will be I’m sure. Enjoy the play and please let me know how it goes!

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**SassMaster28**  ( _Draft_ )  
 _21 Dec 20:16_

Thank you again for making my birthday special it means a lot to me Harry.

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_SassMaster28 is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_24 Dec 00:00_

HAPPY 30TH BIRTHDAY YOU OLD MAN!

**SassMaster28**   
_24 Dec 00:02_

Watch it young man. But than you, you are the first one who wished me a happy birthday - now my sister is screaming it through the wall. Oh family……

**BananaBoy**   
_24 Dec 00:05_

I’m kidding, but I do wish you the best day there is Louis, and an update on the Nativity and why I’m up so late. It was amazing, the students did great and the parents loved it. The Headmistress even came up to me and thanked me for making it the best one they had in years. So pat on the back for Harry. Gemma showed up and she is stay at my flat so we can leave tomorrow at 6 am. She is driving since I’m still up and probably won’t be fall asleep anytime soon.

**SassMaster28**   
_24 Dec 00:08_

Yes, I’m trying to sleep but my phone is blowing up with texts and Facebook posts. I am never on the stupid thing but somehow everyone thinks that is the proper way to tell me happy birthday. You get sleep Hazza. Thank you again for the birthday wishes (:

**BananaBoy**   
_24 Dec 00:10_

*video attached*

**BananaBoy**   
_24 Dec 00:11_

Have a great day Lou, I wish you a great year of memories, and hope it’s spent with friends and family. Talk to you soon. I need sleep, my eyes are growing heavy as I type this out on my mobile screen. Night.

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**SassMaster28**   
_25 Dec 15:48_

How has your day been? Hope your step-dads side of the family hasn't driven you mental yet. I’m about to pass out from eating too much of my mum’s roast, homemade mash, green beans, rolls, salad, the best macaroni in the entire world. Everyone is passed out on couches, the kids are playing with the toys and my mum and her sister are chatting over a cuppa. I’m in my room having some much needed quiet time. I might pop in a film and sleep while it plays.

**BananaBoy**   
_25 Dec 15:50_

It’s decent. A lot of them are too drunk to care what we say. Gemma and I are enjoying some tea while she blogs for a bit and I chat with you. I got new jumpers for work but the best thing I got this year was a new record player and some Fleetwood Mac albums. I will go to bed tonight a happy man.

**SassMaster28**   
_25 Dec 15:54_

Sick! I got a new pair of vans, a few new films and then my sister got me tickets to see James Bay which was nice of her. I’m excited for I love James Bay, and then got some gift cards and little things I needed, like socks and pants. I got my sister tickets for Glastonbury.

**BananaBoy**   
_25 Dec 15:56_

Those are on sale?!? Or did you use your super music powers?

**SassMaster28**   
_25 Dec 15:56_

Super music powers. If you ever need tickets let me know I can get you weekend passes. I actually get to go to Lolla and SXSW this year for 'work'

**BananaBoy**   
_25 Dec 16:00_

Not going to lie I'm really jealous!! I got Gemma a coffee mug she wanted and then gift cards, a book, and a new jumper with unicorns on it. We are those siblings lol. Do you go to a lot of music festivals?

**SassMaster28**   
_25 Dec 16:03_

Eh. Kinda… I usually go to Glastonbury for fun with Niall then work. But this year I decided to treat myself and go to a few more (: My eyes are heavy, my belly is heavy, I shall nap. Enjoy the time with family Harry. Go make snow angels and eat lots of food.

**BananaBoy**   
_25 Dec 16:05_

Have a good nap, Gemma wants me to sing some carols with her so wish me luck!

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**SassMaster28**   
_26 Dec 13:50_

Head back to London early. I love my family but stuff came up with work…. sadly and then I have a work party that Jayme always throws. I have my car filled with my suitcase, presents and food from my mum’s. Nothing beats home cooked food even if you have to reheat it lol.

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_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_26 Dec 14:00_

Safe travels. I am spending boxing day eating, drinking coffee and watching classic movies on the telly, my mum’s family canceled last minute to it’s me, Gemma, mum and step-father. It’s a quiet day and much appreciated, though I’ve been trying to write some lesson plans and get ahead of the game for if i wait I know that I will just push it off till the day before I go back.

**BananaBoy**   
_26 Dec 14:02_

My mum keeps asking who I’m messaging and I’m not sure what I should tell her so I said a friend… she gave me a look all mothers give and I had to clarify we were just friends and she let it be. Thankfully. Anyway I won’t bore you with my jibber jabber. Drive safe, be careful we are supposed to get more snow.

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 _SassMaster28_   _is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_26 Dec 18:15_

I’m back, and now headed to the office, we are playing message tag lol. Hope your day has been good Harry, enjoy the silence as I go and deal with petty issues that arose while I was gone and apparently are so important that I HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM TODAY. *pounds head on a wall* Oh well, I will bring some dessert with me to munch on for my dinner.

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_26 Dec 18:30_

Boooo. No one should spend boxing day working. I would also eat food, you don’t need your stomach getting all upset with all the sugar. Today has been good, my niece came over and she braided my hair for me while her mum and my mum made supper. It feels nice to have the long locks off my neck - and yes I have pictures thanks to Gemma lol. We are off to the cinema to see the Sherlock Christmas special - always message if you are bored (: Unless you forgot and are logged in without know it then watch out - I might spam your inbox (; 

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**SassMaster28**   
_26 Dec 23:00_

Home. Hungry. Tired. Goodnight.

_SassMaster28 is offline_

**BananaBoy**   
_26 Dec 23:05_

Goodnight Louis (:  


	6. VI

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_1 Jan 03:15_

Happy new year Lou! I just got home and I'm bloody knackered! I hope your holiday party was fun, make any New Year's resolutions? I didn't - I should but I will end up breaking it once a week passes by. My phone is on 2% so if I don't

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**  
_1 Jan 03:30_

Happy 2016 Harold! I'm assuming your mobile died and you are now asleep. The party was good, a lot of drunk co-workers, I walked in on Niall and his fiancé and turned around (oops), a few random people that Jayme knows we're there and tried to chat me up but I wasn't into it. So while everyone kissed someone at midnight I gave the bottle of beer I was drinking a kiss and finished it off. I'm safely back home, in my jimjams curled undergo duvet. Thank the high powers there is no work tomorrow. I will spend the day in my jimjams, drinking coffee and watching  _Doctor Who_  because I'm 30 and can! Also I did make a resolution this year, but I'm keeping it written down and not telling anyone. Happy 2016 Hazza (:

_SassMaster28 is offline_

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_SassMaster28 is online_

_BananaBoy is online_

**SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:27_

So have you had any more dates? Not to be a nosey rosey.

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:27_

No, I've been trying to focus on school this term, and there is family issues that have come up so it's easier for me to just not add extra stress.

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:30_

If everything okay with your mum and Gemma and step-dad?

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:30_

Yes, no illness or anything like that. So it's just a lot of chances happening and what not. But I got back next week, I don't want my holiday to end :(

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:32_

I'm sure you will love it once you start up. The kids probably miss your face (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:35_

Awwww well thank you for those kind words Louis. Yeah well I miss my bed as silly as that sounds, but it will be nice to curl up and read before passing out. How are things with messing with people?

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:36_

Eh, no one of interest to fuck with lol. A few girls have tried to match with me but I’m not that mean to mess with them.

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:37_

When does school begin?

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:37_

Monday. And I never planned my lessons so, I should get to that….. to be an adult sucks. How are things with work for you?

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:38_

Eh, you know. We are trying to get a few more hands on deck. We have a new band we are trying to decide if we want to sign them or not so Niall and I have been going back and forth with a few others and we are making our final decision this Friday. I hate this for I know they have talent but it’s if they will work on the label or not, and it just hurts when we have to turn them away and down but it’s out of love and respect. But it’s a job, and that’s the shitty part of it.

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:40_

I’m sure whatever you choose that will be the right choice. You know better than anyone what will work and not. I know nothing of the music industry but I’m sure that if they don’t fit the label there is one out there for them. You are a clever man Louis Tomlinson and I know that whatever you do it will be right.

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:43_

Thanks, I actually needed that pep talk Harry. It’s been a shit couples of days and I’ve been stressed which means stress eating which I don’t need when i have all the holiday weight that I already put on - I need to get back into the gym but I hate the gym. But I don’t enjoy the Tommo tummy so the gym I must go….

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:45_

If that what you call your stomach?

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:45_

Yes, when I eat too much I have a little pudge. The Tommo Tummy and i should copyright it. It’s clever. Hell I’m clever (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:46_

Don’t toot your own horn there mister lol

 **SassMaster28**  
_5 Jan 11:47_

I will toot it all I want Harold! You go make lesson plans, I need to get lunch… add to this Tommo tummy (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_5 Jan 11:50_

You do that you weirdo! lol

_SassMaster28 is offline_

_BananaBoy is offline_

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_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_11 Jan 20:00_

Work was work. Oh lord, I need sleep, coffee, and to grade papers. But I am going to lay down for a kip and just….. sleep. for.ever.and.ever………..

 **BananaBoy**  
_11 Jan 22:00_

I just woke up….. now to be a proper teacher and grade papers. Hope that your meeting went well. I haven’t heard from you in a few days. Hope all is well and you didn’t fall into a well…. or have been eaten by a bear (: lol

_BananaBoy is offline_

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_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_13 Jan 06:45_

Hey….. long time no talk. Not to sound clingy but I’m a bit worried that I haven’t heard anything. I hope that you are okay. Please just let me know Louis. Okay. I will check again tonight…. okay. Please just let me know. Okay.

_BananaBoy is offline_

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_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_16 Jan 15:00_

Okay Louis I was worried but now I’m not sure if you are just blowing me off. If you are can you just let me know so I stop messaging you and looking like a fucking tit. Okay? I’m sorry for whatever I did to piss you off to just stop talking to me but I would like a heads up. It’s the nice thing to do. Okay.

 **BananaBoy**  
_16 Jan 15:02_

But if there is something going on. Just let me know. I’m worried. Worried like hell and people can tell and just let me know. Okay. Thank you.

_BananaBoy is offline_

\---

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:00_

Harry I am sorry. My nan passed away last week and I dropped everything I had and went back home to help my mum with the arrangements. I then stayed at home with my sisters and mum and dad after the funeral and I had to get my thoughts together. I was really close with her and it hit me hard… I’m still not sure how to deal with it at times but I have to keep pressing on. I am not mad at you, god I feel like the ass hat who just never replied but I wasn’t able to. I was so distraught with everything that I was a mess. Nial had to drive me to Donnie that was how out of my mind I was. I am not mad - god you have done nothing to make me upset. Please don’t think that and if you don’t reply I will use all the power I have to find your home address and pound on your flat door and tell you that I’m not upset. I’m still not sure how to keep going - I use work to distract me but other than that I just feel odd. My nan helped raised me when my mum and dad had to work, my mum had me when her and my dad were dating and it was hard on them for they didn’t have any money. She was in Uni as was he and my nan was the one who took care of me when they went to class and… she was everything to me Harry and it’s been a shitty two weeks. I would love for you to come on line and just talk to me as I sit, unable to sleep.

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:15_

LOUIS I FEEL LIKE AN ASS I’M SO SORRY YOU SHOULD HATE ME FOR BEING SO FOUL WITH YOU.

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:15_

No. I’m just glad that you are online. I can’t sleep. I feel like a kid who just had a nightmare and is afraid if they close there eyes they have the same nightmare all over again.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:17_

What do you want me to do?

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:18_

Just tell me what you have been up to. I just need something to distract me, and I have missed so much. I just need you, as silly and if you find it weird then just say so, just talk to me.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:19_

That is not silly. Okay let me see….. hmmmmmmm. I got a save the date for my mate Zayn’s wedding. I don’t have a date so that will be fun. There will be an open bar, the one thing about Zayn’s family they love an open bar so that plus me, plus a cabbie waiting to bring my drunk arse home will be a decent time. I should find a date but I don’t want to get some random man to bring to the wedding and have all the questions asked and it be awkward.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:20_

Work is all good, professor evil is on leave….. he almost hit a child so the school is seeing if they can find him redundant but they fear a lawsuit from him so who knows? We got a new teacher and all the young girls are fawning over him. Funny enough he is gay and has a boyfriend. He was telling me about him today at lunch and it was cute to see him so happy. Ummm…. I got a new student, he then was taken from my class and put into a reform school for he threw a chair at a student's head. Scariest moment as a teacher - no the spider was worse. This was the second scariest.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:25_

Gemma got a job with Buzzfeed in NYC. So she is begging me to help her move out there and get settled in, and I didn’t want to but I’ve always wanted to go to New York and thought it would be the perfect holiday. Plus my mum said she would get my plane ticket as a birthday present for me. So I will be going to New York on my spring break with school. If you have been, which I’m sure that you have, some tips on places to go would be appreciated (: She is thrilled and I’m so proud of her and she has worked so hard in Uni and now she can show off her skills but Buzzfeed is amazing. It’s a healthy addiction news site I have. I’ve been thinking of getting another new Tattoo, I said I will get it for my bday gift.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:27_

So the tattoo I was thinking of getting these leaves that start a little under my belly button, but down more towards my goodies and then up my hips. That was a shit description here this will be better

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:30_

*picture attached*

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:30_

I got addicted to Downton Abbey. It’s bad I’ve watched all 5 seasons in two weekends and I am caught up with Season 6. I am a hopeless romantic and I am not ashamed to admit it. I love Tom, and Mary and Sybil was a woman after my own heart!!! If you haven’t watched it you need to Louis it’s beautiful and oh lord I want to watch it all over again for it was so perfect. I mean it’s MAGGIE FREAKIN SMITH!!!!!!

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:32_

I might make tea and get all dressed up and watch it. Yes. I’ve turned into that twat. Wow. I can’t believe I just told you that. Wow. Wow. Wow Hazza. Wow.

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:35_

My sister’s love Downton. I might have to check it out, is it on Netflix?

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:36_

No. But you can be the kind of person I am and go out and purchase them all.

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:37_

Bahahahahaha

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:40_

I have been to New York. Many times for work and then a few times for pleasure. Time Square, Central Park, go to SoHo and just walk around, get a bike and ride around Brooklyn. You will fit in there for sure. I look like a tool when I’m in my work clothes but when I’m in normal Louis clothes I can blend in there as well (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:42_

Noted (:

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:45_

When is your birthday?

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:46_

The 1st. Why?

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:48_

Curiosity. I got my nan’s name tattooed on my side. I was drunk as hell and so was Niall but I am glad I did.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:50_

That’s one you won’t regret

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:51_

Never.

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:59_

Thank you Harry.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 03:00_

Anything for you Louis. Is there anything else that I can do for you?

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 03:02_

No. I’m getting sleepy now. Oh! If you don’t have a date and it’s a week away to the wedding you can always bring me. I love a good open bar and I’m not that bad of a dancer if I do say so myself (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 03:05_

Really???

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 03:06_

Yeah (: I would be honoured to go with you. If you need me to.

 **BananaBoy**  
_20 Jan 02:10_

Thank you Lou. If you can’t sleep just message me, I will keep my volume on

 **SassMaster28**  
_20 Jan 02:13_

Thank you again Hazza. You are to kind to me. Night (:

_SassMaster28 is offline_

 

_BananaBoy is offline_

 


	7. VII

_SassMaster28 is online_

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 07:50_

I get to work today and Anne, she works in the office comes into my classroom and in her arms was this massive. MASSIVE basket. I'm thinking it's from the teachers but then I see that Anne looks puzzled as she sat it down in my desk. She told me this arrived this morning by a very polished man in a suit, a black peacoat and a cheeky smile that could convince a nun to sin against God. So I assumed it was you.

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 07:51_

Once she left I opened up the basket that was nearly wrapped and laughed as I pulled it the banana grams game, a book of dad jokes - which I tell the best ones, an amazing rainbow mug with Yorkshire tea with a note saying 'it's the only tea a true English man drinks' along with my favorite chocolates, and a what looked like a weekend pass to Glastonbury (which I might have cried about)

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:00_

It was the birthday elf (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 08:00_

Named Louis Tomlinson. You. This is to much Lou and it made this Monday a whole lot better but- the pass to Glastonbury it's not even on sale and the mug now has tea in it and I will be making Gemma play banana grams with me tonight for that's what 27 year olds. Thank you. It's crazy to say but this present is so me, like everything about it is just me and my last boyfriend didn't even listen when I said I like a new chocolate or anything. It's just- thank you so much and it's silly I feel that how appreciative I am isn't being conveyed via a screen.

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:03_

It's your birthday you loon! And I know you and I know you are appreciative and I did it for its your birthday and someone said you should always feel special on your birthday. What's the point of any relationship if you don't listen? I mean I had to double check a few things from past conversations but I always listen when you tell me stuff.

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:05_

So any fun plans tonight?

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 08:07_

Dinner with Gemma and my mates Zayn, his fiancé and Xander. Nothing big since it's Monday and we all work tomorrow. My mum and step-dad are coming out Friday and taking Gemma and I to dinner. But I feel the older you get the more your birthday is just another day. And not be sound all gloom and doom but it's just another day (: but I brought cupcakes for my class and I've decided we will watch a movie since it's my birthday and why not!

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:10_

What film???

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 08:11_

Matilda. We read the book now to have a fun day with the film and then we will talk about the differences and there is a lesson to this all I promise. But they have a Maths quiz first and then we have to turn in homework and go over announcements.

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:12_

Fun fun fun (: I'm on this boring conference call..... Niall is making paper airplanes, Delilah has been painting her nails and I'm on my third cup of coffee........ So.Bored.

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:13_

OHH!! Harold: how do you organize a party in space?

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 08:13_

You're telling me a joke?!?

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:14_

If you answer it yes it is -_-

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 08:15_

How??? (And be nice it's my birthday you tit!)

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:15_

You plan it (planet)

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 08:15_

BRILLIANT! FANTASTIC! LEFT ME IN STITCHES! I shall add that to my collection of dad jokes thank you (:

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 08:16_

I have work to do now ): I'll stay logged in on my laptop so if you get bored while the kids watch the film send me a message (: I'll be bugging you later about your birthday so don't worry!

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 08:16_

I look forward to it (:

•••

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:00_

Okay you need to stop with the birthday surprises Louis.

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:00_

Whatever do you mean?

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:02_

*picture attached*

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:03_

A cake! Like what??

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:04_

(:

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:05_

You are spoiling me Louis Tomlinson and I should be cross but I'm not. I'll be cross tomorrow. Lol

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:07_

Sounds good, I'll make a not so when you don't reply I can say 'Harold is cross with me for I sent him a cookie cake on his birthday. Shame on me.'

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:09_

You aren't funny

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:10_

I'm hilarious! Didn't I tell you??

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:13_

Must have missed the memo...... Lol(:

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:14_

My students were curious what I got, it was delivered right as the bell rang. How do you have such magical powers?

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:15_

I'm a wizard Harry.

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:15_

Stop I just choked on my tea!!! How was the conference call?

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:16_

Good, Ed Sheeran is going to do a colab with one of our artist and it will be a benefit song for Red Nose Day. I also learned Niall makes kick ass paper airplanes!

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:18_

That's amazing! About the song, and I guess the airplanes to lol Well I'll be purchasing that song for sure and I can tell all my friends I know the producer. I'm such a cool kid!

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:20_

That you are Hazza (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_1 Feb 15:21_

I need to pack up my things and head home before Gemma beats me to my own flat. Thanks again Lou, this birthday was beyond words. I will make sure to send pictures of the eaten cookie cake (: thanks again.

 **SassMaster28**  
_1 Feb 15:22_

Anytime Harry (: I'm glad it was the best Monday birthday ever! Have fun tonight and don't get to pissed- you have minds to mold tomorrow!

_BananaBoy is offline_

_SassMaster28 is offline_

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_SassMaster 28 is online_

**SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 09:38_

4 people are put sick with the flu. And one of them is Niall. Why must this happen?!? Wash your hands people! I'm praying to whatever god in the universe that can hear me that I don't get sick. I need a holiday but not a forced one due to me being a walking zombie full of germs, snot, and a wheezy voice.

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 09:40_

Not to mention I'm watching Emma and Issac tomorrow while there mum and dad have a nice romantic evening. Even get to bring them to school, I told them I'm practicing my fathering skills for when I decide to adopt. Which is something I was thinking about more - and a tattoo.

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 09:41_

So the tattoo I want on my shoulder and it's a stag type thing (I'll sent a picture) and then a heart between its antlers.

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 09:41_

*picture attached*

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 09:43_

So that will be something I get done this weekend (: school must be keeping you busy on this Wednesday. There is no one at work and it's a lot of busy work to get done.... Maybe I'll let myself go home early. Pop by my sister at Uni and get some lunch. Or I could go and get my nipple pierced. I mean I only have two but I'm sure your 4 would all look good with a ring on them :p I'm a tit I know

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_13 Feb 09:50_

I have been struck down by the might hand of the flu. I got sick in the middle of the night and haven't been out of the bathroom longer than 5 minutes. Thankfully there was nothing left in my stomach around 5 and I was able to sleep a few hours. Now I'm circles up on the couch, Doctor Who is playing idly on Netflix and I'm sipping water. But your messages made me smile. So to cover what your said 1) the tattoo is sick! If you don't get it I will 2) ummmmm you failed to expand on the whole wanting to adopt a child so please fill me in on the details. Thanks. 3) you need a holiday, you work your ass off and everyone should have a holiday! Mine comes in a few weeks in the form of the big apple!

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 09:55_

NO YOU CANT BE INFECTED! NOOOOOOO *drops to knees like Marlon Brando in Streetcar Named Desire and cries out* HARROOOLLLDDDDDD!

 **BananaBoy**  
_13 Feb 09:56_

Bahahahahah! Sadly yes ): thankfully I have till Monday to get better. And before you ask, Gemma is stopping by today with food I can attempt to eat after not vomiting for 24 hours. I have what I need and have Lysol-ed my flat so the germs can die!

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 10:00_

Still. The flu sucks balls. When I'm sick I turn into an ugly version of myself.

 **BananaBoy**  
_13 Feb 10:01_

Don't we all?? I'm okay I needed to slow down and I knew it but wouldn't listen to my body and so it did this to me. Bleh. So back to child adopting. You keep avoiding the topic Mr. Tomlinson.

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 10:02_

It's nothing new, I was at my sister Frances (like from dirty dancing) her gender reveal party as there was babies of their friends and I just hit that age where I can be a dad(obviously) but I want to be a dad. So I've been looking into adoption. Nothing serious but I'm setting the wheels in motion for when I do.

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 10:03_

Also she is having a girl (:

 **BananaBoy**  
_13 Feb 10:03_

Girls are fun to shop for, better selection. But that's great! You will make an excellent father Louis, and I'm not just saying that either. Well if you ever need free child watching I'll be more than happy to. Zayn jokes I have a baby issue. I love babies and they love me, q mother can hand me her crying baby and it stops. I'm the baby whisperer!

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 10:04_

Oh wow. Well it won't be anytime soon. I'm sure you will be happily married by the time I have a kid.

 **BananaBoy**  
_13 Feb 10:05_

Sure..... I wouldn't hold my breath. My eyes are tired. I'm going to sleep.

 **SassMaster28**  
_13 Feb 10:07_

If you need anything I'll use my wizard powers to bring it to you! Feel better Hazza

_SassMaster28 if offline_

_BananaBoy is offline_

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

_SassMaster28 is online_

**BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:34_

Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?

 **SassMaster28**  
_14 Feb 13:34_

Are you delusional from a fever????

 **BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:35_

Of course they do! It's very scent-imental (:

 **SassMaster28**  
_14 Feb 13:35_

....... I would give that one a 3.

 **BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:35_

But wait I have more!

 **SassMaster28**  
_14 Feb 13:35_

They better be good!!

 **BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:36_

What did the light bulb say to the other light bulb???

 **SassMaster28**  
_14 Feb 13:36_

What........

 **BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:36_

I love you a whole watt!

 **SassMaster28**  
_14 Feb 13:40_

That one is an 8.5 (: you feeling better?

 **BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:42_

Yes and no. Still don't want to eat but I slept more hours the past few days then I have since going to Uni. I'm still on my couch, Gemma came over with food, put it in the fridge and dropped of flowers and a card for singles awareness day.

 **SassMaster28**  
_14 Feb 13:44_

Yes, the love bug is going around here to. Everyone's all happy. There is cake and goodies and I was nice and got Jayme a gift for all his hard work. I sent my mum a card and oh, happy Valentine's Day my funny little internet mate(:

 **BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:45_

Happy Valentine's Day Tommo (: I have more jokes!

 **SassMaster28**  
_14 Feb 13:47_

I have a meeting but send them to me and I'll read them on my cab ride home. I'm playing hookie after this meeting (:

_SassMaster is offline_

**BananaBoy**  
_14 Feb 13:47_

What did one oar say to the other? “Can I interest you in a little row-mance?”

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**  
_21 Feb 14:00_

Any luck for a date for the wedding?

 **BananaBoy**  
_21 Feb 14:02_

Ha! No. I’m a teacher who goes to school, comes home and chats with someone on my mobile while grading papers lol. But it’s okay, I’ve been doing online shopping for New York (: I might have just gotten a whole new wardrobe for the trip. I shouldn’t but I did. Oops. I’m making Gemma go with me to see Finding Neverland, and Phantom of The Opera.

 **SassMaster28**  
_21 Feb 14:05_

You will love New York. I still need to use my vacation days and get out of town for a week. Someplace with sun, a beach where I can get brown as a nut and just unplug.

 **BananaBoy**  
_21 Feb 14:10_

You would go on a holiday with just you?

 **SassMaster28**  
_21 Feb 14:13_

No. I would want a companion. But alas I don’t have many options lol

 **BananaBoy**  
_21 Feb 14:15_

I’m sure you will be able to find one, you are a handsome man and if all else fails bring Niall he seems like a good wingman when you chat up the men.

 **SassMaster28**  
_21 Feb 14:16_

You have no idea what Niall is. He is… well I’m convinced he is an actual leprechaun lol. Well speaking of leprechaun’s he is coming over to do some work. It never ends I tell you. I will talk to you later Hazza (: And I expect a nice detailed list of photos for your trip lol

 **BananaBoy**  
_21 Feb 14:20_

I shall (: I have papers to grade and should be a proper teacher. Have a good day Lou and if you need a companion for the holiday and can’t find one I will go, spend all your money and chat up the pool boy

_BananaBoy is offline_

**SassMaster28** ( _draft_ )  
_21 Feb 14:21_

Harry what would you do if you met someone and said you didn’t want a relationship but then over a few months you realized you were an arrogant arse and that you might like said friend? Should you tell them? Or tell them by indirectly inviting them to a music festival…. or on holiday to some island to get tan and unplug from technology? Or should you just keep your lips shut and hurt inside for you have feelings and you haven’t had these feeling since you were 20.

 

_SassMaster28 is offline_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) THANK YOU ALL FOR THE VOTES AND THE COMMENTS AND JUST THE LOVE. I have been overwhelmed by fellow readers kind words for this fic (and Smoke & Mirrors) you all make me smile daily and know that others are enjoying my writing as much as I LOVE to make it  
> 2) I have a twitter. While my pen name is Violet Janou I never had a twitter for my writing I just had a personal one but alas I made one and it's up and running (its violet_janou so original I know). So you can look there and I will put updates and have rants about 1D and you can see more into my mental little world I live in at times (:  
> 3) I want to thank musicluvr10 being amazing with her tags and taking to twitter for my fics, you have brought me to tears with your kind words and love for my fics. Thank you so much  
> 4) Sorry I didn't update sooner, I had three days of work where I closed, opened and then closed and today I had to adult and get tickets for a musical and sit with a friend and have a nice conversation about politics, women in film and feminism. All my favorite topics to discuss. But I promised before my head hit the pillow before I go and open up tomorrow I would have this done (and it would have been up sooner but Project Runway was on today and well I love that show). 
> 
> Thank you all for your comments and kudos. Stay beautiful! 
> 
> XO  
> Vi
> 
> Oh! Also if you have a good dad joke (or Harry styled joke) please tweet me or leave a comment!
> 
> (feel free to add me on twitter I'm really nice I promise you)


	8. VIII

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_14 March 06:00_

AHHHHH. I’m off to NYC! I will be one when I have wifi! Wish me luck! Hopefully I want to come back to London or maybe my heart will be left in New York. Who knows? Gemma is giving me an evil look - she says hello by the way. Have a great week Lou! Make sure to book that holiday for yourself and a plus one (: Ttys

_BananaBoy is offline_

\---

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**  ( _draft)_  
 _14 March 08:49_

I woke up and saw your message and I wanted to tell you to be safe and that I loved you. I don’t say that. What have you done to me Harry? I’m not a tin man but I never thought those words would come to my mind so easily or my hands would be willing to type those out on a phone and send them to someone I had never met face to face. Be safe. I will miss talking to you, it will be weird not having you in my life like normal. But I won’t bother you. Enjoy the big apple.

 **SassMaster28**   _(draft)  
_ _15 March 23:00_

I got home from work today and had a beer and realized that we should meet. We should get coffee and talk. Why, I have a lot to tell you and it’s been building up that today I was at work and I called Niall you. I don’t know why but your name came out of my mouth and he looked at me as if was crazy. So I told him about you… I wasn’t sure what to say but he didn’t laugh and he was shocked that I was so serious about someone. But I’m not sure I should ask you out. Is that okay after us talking and me joking about you finding someone. I mean my offer for the wedding was to help you out but I wanted to go to a wedding with you…. I’m turning into a teenage girl with a crush and I’m not sure how to handle this Harry. Shit.

**SassMaster28** _(draft)  
_ _16 March 01:00_

I can’t sleep. I can’t sleep for you are on my mind and I want it to stop. I need to tell you all of this but I’m me and I can hide behind my sass but there is so much more. I don’t know when it happened, maybe it was the dad jokes, or your charm but damn it Harry I’ve fallen and at this point I don’t want to get up. I hope NYC is treating you right, maybe I won’t have to worry about telling you anything for you will come back and have this new American boy toy you snogged at some bar and are head over heals about. Then I will feel like scum and I’m not sure what is better slowly dying from my feelings, or dying from knowing you could be with someone not me. Fuck.

 **SassMaster28**   _(draft_ )  
 _17 March 18:35_

Okay this whole not hearing from you is driving me mental. Niall asked about you today, he actually walked into my office, handed me a cuppa, shut the door and sat down and asked me about you. I told him, I told him I had feelings, and that you did at first but I said no and not I wasn’t sure if you still had them or if I had screwed over those chances with you. I told him that you make me smile like I’m 16 and in love. You tell horrible jokes and that I look forward to getting a message from you and knowing that no matter how shit of a day I was having reading the words you type me makes it better. How I feel for how you love kids, and that you are probably the best teacher out there in London. You love your family and that I want to meet them, and see Cheshire with you and that I’m not sure what to think. He told me I should tell you but I can’t. Not yet. I will. One day. Soon.

 **SassMaster28**   _(draft_ )  
 _17 March 20:00_

I went to dinner with my sister Chrissy and I told her about you. I told her everything and how I was sure that you could be the one. Is that silly? It didn’t seem silly as the words came out of my mouth, and her eyes grew wide and she cried. She actually cried when I told her about you and how I am heal over head for you and I would do anything to more forward as a couple. I wouldn’t change anything for we might not be where we are now - or have gotten to know each other this way and I’m so glad that we have. Just don’t change Harry. Even if we don’t end up together never change for a man. You are the most original, selfish, charming and lovable man in the world and I would hate to see you change for someone who didn’t love you the way you are. I love you.

_SassMaster28 is offline_

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

_SassMaster28 is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_18 March 10:00_

I’m so tired but I’m back in London. I might sleep for the next 24 hours but New York was amazing. I did all you said I should and I fell in love. It was this amazing moment I had there. I could and would move there if I had the chance. Gemma has a decent flat and she loves her new job. Oh! Do you have a place where a little long haired elf could send you a special surprise from New York????

**SassMaster28**   
_18 March 10:05_

Louis W. Tomlinson  
P.O.B #754  
London, E.C #1  
England

**BananaBoy**   
_18 March 10:07_

Thanks (: Also the musicals were amazing, I mean we have good ones here but the variety. Hell the variety of everything in America is a bit mental but it was amazing. It was odd not talking with you daily so that was the only issue I had while I was in America. Did you get your stag tattoo? I was hoping to get a picture of you showing it off. I will send you pictures late of me being a very British in America lol

**SassMaster28**   
_18 March 10:10_

I did get it (: I dragged Niall’s arse with me like a good mate does no? I look forward to the pictures Hazza. I have to get work done and my mum is coming for lunch today. Time to be a proper adult. I’ve missed you and we shall talk later all about your holiday!

**SassMaster28**   
_18 March 10:11_

*picture attached*

_SassMaster28 if offline_

**BananaBoy**   
_18 March 10:13_

I love the new ink! Okay good, I want to hear about your few days of being a big shot music producer and what other things you did. I did miss talking to you and I hope that you aren’t put off that I wasn’t on while in New York. Gemma was a bit worried about going there and I wanted to be a good brother and spend time with her and not be the dick on his mobile. I will be sending of your surprise today! Have a fun lunch with your mum Lou.

_BananaBoy if offline_

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:35_

I hit the point. I started looking up flights for Hawaii, Florida, Bahamas and Greece. I need a break from work- I love what I do. But I need to take a breath.

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:36_

What's going on?

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:37_

Just the politics behind everything and setting up things for these musical festivals and there is an all female band I want so bad on this label. They are what we need and everything they stand for, there songs are what needs to be in the radios and others disagree with me and I about flipped a table in a conference room. I'm signing them and everyone can fuck off. Why is there this stigma that a woman band can’t be a powerful and changing as a fucking boy band? Like JFC! I want to scream it’s actual shit and I went off on them - Niall was even worried. He sat there his eyes were wide and he couldn’t move. If I have to use my money to get this album out by fucking hell I will.

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:39_

Also thank you for the coffee mug and candy! You remembered me taking you they were my favorite (: I didn’t even think about them until I got the box and opened it up and the cookies. I ate them all before Niall could get his hands on them. I now have a massive stomach ache but that could be about this bull shit people are giving me. Can you come over here and talk some sense into this idiots. I feel that you’re dimples will win them over.

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:40_

I will march my arse over there now and I will stand on the conference table and give them my gender speech, as long as you give me some ‘you tell them hazza’ and ‘what a brilliant point!’ as I rant for a few hours you got it (:

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:41_

Maybe I will just retire and go and raise bees. I should have enough in the bank.

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:43_

Okay Sherlock Holmes

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:45_

Huh??

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:46_

The last story of Sherlock he retires and raises bees…. you have read Sherlock Holmes. I mean it’s law you are English.

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:47_

I read the fun stories, and I’ve watched the TV show. Are you sure you are right?

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:50_

Yes. Oh, my mum is setting me up with a son of her friends. She said since I need a date for the wedding he might be good boyfriend material. I’m doing this for her but I don’t want to go on this date. He is getting all posh and fancy and while I do love a good black tie dinner but I rather wear my skinny black trousers and a nice button down shirt with a pattern on it and boots.

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:50_

You should be dating, you are to young and cute not to be lol. I am an old man who is grumpy

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:55_

You are 30 not 60 you twat.

**SassMaster28**   
_20 March 12:56_

Same thing! Well I’m off Niall is almost here and we are going to pub to watch the game and drink. Happy Sunday (: Let me know how your date goes.

_SassMaster28 is offline_

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:47_

I have a joke. Ready? Okay! *clears throat*

**BananaBoy**   
_20 March 12:49_

Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them (:

_BananaBoy is offline_

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_21 March 19:00_

Monday night date. If I text you SOS please come and save me. He might be killing me. I’ve never been this nervous and he is a lawyer. What. I don’t date lawyers. So here goes nothing. God can I be sck. Nope. there is the buzzer. Shit.

_BananaBoy is offline_

_\---_

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_21 March 22:00_

It was good. Not bad. good. He was nice and we had a lot to talk about, he goes a lot of work with kids in abusive homes which I admired in him but there was something that wasn’t gelling for me. He asked me out on another date and I said maybe. Was that stupid? Maybe I’m just okay being where I am in my life single. Or maybe he wasn’t the right one. He didn’t laugh at the jokes either which hurt me a bit. Oh well, I have class tomorrow first day back from break. Hope everything is okay with you and the band I know you have been stressed but you know what you are doing Louis. You have a good head on your shoulders and follow your gut and heart and if these are the ones you need to sign then sign the fuck out of them and promote them better than any band and treat them like you would treat any band. I know you will for you are amazing like that. Goodnight love

**BananaBoy**   
_21 March 22:00_

Lou! I don’t know why my phone corrected that to love. God. Sorry.

_BananaBoy is offline_

\---

 _SassMaster28_   _is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_23 March 01:00_

So I can’t sleep. Shocking. Not really. So I was thinking maybe I should give it all up and not be a beekeeper but just a tour manager again. Sleep on shitty busses and be up to late, deal with fangirls and drink cheap beer and eat shit food and hope to be home around Holidays. I did that for several years and then started Rover Records. Maybe Niall could hold the fort down and I might just go on tour with the all girl band (which I signed and they are in the studio tomorrow to do a single they will drop as they work on an EP). Maybe that’s why I can’t sleep. I will go make some tea and watch telly till I pass out on the couch.

 **SassMaster28**  ( _draft_ )  
 _23 March 01:05_

I felt weird writing back after your date. I wanted you to have a bad one. I wanted to be selfish but I still can’t come to tell you how I feel. I wanted you to tell me that you didn’t enjoy the date for you had feelings for me, but that would be to easy and this isn’t a movie or a book. shit. Why can’t I be an adult. I can’t be an adult for if I say something and fuck this up I wil hate myself. You have been keeping me up every night since we met. It has been getting worse the past few weeks.

_SassMaster28 is offline_

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_23 March 20:00_

Hey is everything okay? I haven’t seen you online and I know last time your nan passed away. I hope that all is well with you. I am still dateless for the wedding so dust off your suit lol. Are things okay… the last few times we have talked things have seemed different. Maybe it’s just me being me but I hope that everything is okay and that I didn’t offend you in any way. So can you just give me heads up to what is going on. (: H

 **BananaBoy**  ( _draft_ )  
 _25_   _March 03:00_

Hey can you please message me Louis. I don’t know if I should say this but it’s been on my heart the past few days and it’s 3 am, I just watched Love Actually and I’m semi drunk on red wine and I wanted to say that I have tried, I mean I have tried really hard not to say anything but hell I have to say it. I like you Louis and I tried when I was in New York to get over this crush but I had a long talk with Gemma and I can’t. It’s more than a crush - whatever is it it’s real feelings and I feel that we would be good together. Really good, no matter if you went back on the road with the band, and I was teaching children. We have this connection and I feel - I just don’t want you to think that it won’t work without giving it a try. I could even say I am falling in love with you without even meeting you face to face. Just give me a chance. Please Louis.

**BananaBoy**   
_26 March 17:00_

Hey stranger can you say something so I know that you are alive? I won’t bother you, you must be crazy with work and I hope the band is working out and I will leave you be until you are ready to talk again. I don’t want to be too annoying. Know that I’m here for you Louis whatever you need I am here so just give me a shout. I miss talking to you, I miss you. I’m sorry if you ran off for I was getting too flirtty - I want to say I wasn’t but I was. I have been flirting with you since we started talking and maybe it was the point but it was just so easy and I felt the chemistry. I will step back for I know what you said about a relationship and I don’t want you to think I only was talking to you to sway you mind. I wasn’t. Okay I think I have embarrassed myself enough. Talk to you soon Louis.

_BananaBoy is offline_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words can't begin to explain how amazing you all are with this fic. Thank you for everyone who has read it and has given this weird idea a shot! Today has been a shitty day (head and neck issues plus I slammed my finger in a drawer at work casing me to hiss 'fooking hell' while customers were around) so I was happy to get home and finish up this chapter. Only a few more left and I'm really excited for the ones that are coming up! 
> 
> XO  
> Vi!


	9. IX

_SassMaster28 is online_

**SassMaster28**   
_31 March 02:30_

Harry. I have been a horrible friend and human being. I wasn't sure how to handle a lot of stuff that was going on and I didn't want to be ugly with you. I could blame my actions on stress but it was more from fear. I have been for the past months growing attached to you in a romantic way. It was slow but one day I opened my eyes and checked my phone to see if there was a message from you and my chest felt light and happy. It was that day I realized that when I told you I didn't want a relationship I was doing that for myself. I had been in a relationship and that went south but there is something so natural about the way we interact that it feels right. It might sound silly but I've been trying to figure out how to write this. I had Niall come over last night and help me compose a rough draft. My heart is racing and my sleep has been shit for I have been thinking about telling you and there is that slight fear that well, you won't feel the same way. I know you had a date and I don't want to step on toes and make any of this change your mind but there is something there Hazza. I was flirting with you shamelessly. I look back and realized that I didn't even try to hide it at points, and I never corrected you for the fact that well, I liked when you flirted with me. I don't know if this will go further than this but I want to lay it all out there for you. I care about you as a friend and more. I would like to take you on a proper date where you wear that black shirt with the white hearts all over it that you love so much and you're pink boots or even the sparkle ones you were so proud of finding. I want to run my hands over your tattoos and just study you and stare into those beautiful eyes, hear your laugh and get to know even more about you. I want to hold your hand in mine and I want to just sit and do nothing. I want to play bananagrams with you and have you give me more of those amazing Christmas cookies. I want to know you Harry and have a relationship with you. I want to go to this wedding as a date, I want you to show me off to the world and i want to bring you to stupid functions I have with work and show you off. I want to go to Glastonbury and become one with the music and have a moment where nothing else matters. I want to do all of this and while this seems like a lot to dump on a person I can't keep this in anymore.

**SassMaster28**   
_31 March 02:35_

I might not have been in a relationship in a while but I know what you need, you need to be treated like you are the only human in the world. You need to have your dad jokes listened to no matter how bad. You need to be you and that's all I want from you Harry. I have been so raw with you and I never am this way with anyone. You just let me open up to you and it was so easy and you listened to me, you loved me for me and that is what made me fall for you so hard, and the dad jokes. Those were a plus. If I need to get down on my knees and beg I will but I would love for you to give me a chance. I don't need you to commit to being happy with me for 15 years. I just would like the door that was open back on Halloween night and let me steps through and we see what happens. We know each other and I feel that was the best foundation for a future. So please just read this and don't think me an arse. I just had to process this all. And if you say no then we move on like we have the past months. No harm, no foul. Love, Lou

**SassMaster28**   
_31 March 02:37_

And I mean love. Like you did you in your one message (:

_SassMaster28 is offline_

\---

_BananaBoy is online_

**BananaBoy**   
_31 March 08:45_

The door has never been closed Louis. 

**BananaBoy**   
_31 March 08:45_

Saturday meet me at The White Rabbit (it's by Regents Park). 9:45, I'll be in the black shirt with white hearts on it.

_BananaBoy is offline_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this was always meant to be a short chapter.   
> Yes, they finally get to meet (: 
> 
> Thank you for reading and I hope that you all enjoyed 
> 
> XO   
> Vi
> 
> comments and kudos are much loved!


	10. X

_1 April_ 16:00

Louis pressed the speaker button as he leaned into the microphone, “sounds amazing ladies, why don’t we call it a night, drink some tea and we will be back in here Monday,” Louis told them as Logan, Rylee, Roslynn and Mary. The girls took off the headphones and headed out of the recording booth, Louis turned to Steve who was in the sound booth with him. “Okay send those cuts to me and I will work on them this weekend,” Louis told Steve as he saved what they had done, and nodded his head as Louis grabbed his leather bag and headed out where the girls stood.

“Are you sure we sounded good Mr. Tomlinson?” Mary asked as she slipped her leather jacket on.

“Louis, don’t make me sound like an old man, not yet,” he laughed pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “You girls sounded brilliant and this EP is going to sell and it’s going to be a hit, I want to use the song ‘Going’ as the first promo song and try and get it on a few commercials and out there on the radio. I have some pull so I will see what I can do,” he explained to them. “Now, you all enjoy this weekend.”

“You seem chipper,” Logan chuckled as she slung her bag over her shoulder and pushed her ginger hair behind her ears. “You got a hot date with the boy that texts your mobile and when he does you smile like a child?”

Louis tried to suppress a smile as he pointed at her and mimicked her. “Okay, well you can come and clean the bathrooms tomorrow Logan you smart arse, the rest of you enjoy your day off,” he laughed as the girls all gave him a hug and headed out of the recording studio, Louis glanced at his mobile and was a bit sad there wasn’t a message from Harry today. Slipping his mobile into his jacket pocket he headed out of the studio and was about to leave when Niall smiled and fell in step with him. “So are we going to finish the TV show tonight?”

“Yes, I need your help,” Louis told Niall as they headed out of the building and to his car. “I need help finding an outfit for a date.”

Niall stopped in his tracks as Louis knew he was going to have to explain to him what was going on. “Wait. Harry? The mystery man from the dating app Harry? Shut the fuck up!” Niall yelled as he bent over laughing, it wasn’t a mean laugh but one where he wasn’t sure how to react to Louis’s statement that was so out of character for him. “Wait, Lou like seriously?” Niall asked him again this time serious as Louis turned around and nodded his head. “Shit, when did this happen?” He asked as Louis kept walking to his car. “Are you going to fill me in on the details or do I have to guess mate?”

“Get in the car,” Louis said as he tossed his bag into the back seat and got into the drivers side shutting the door.

“Bossy,” Niall hissed as he tossed his bag into the back before getting into the passengers side. “Okay now that MI-6 can’t hear us what happened?”

“I told him how I felt, and he replied back, he said he wants to meet tomorrow at 9:45 at this coffee shop called The White Rabbit…. I don’t know what to do for I haven’t been on a date in almost 10 years. Jesus…. I’m a pathetic man.”

Niall turned to him as Louis started the car, "no, just a bit rusty that's all."

"You make it sound like I haven't had sex in ten years either," Louis sassed as he pulled away from Rover Records and headed to his flat. "It's been awhile since I've been with a person but not that long."

Laughing Niall took a deep breath in and closed his eyes as Louis blew a red light. "Okay so it's just coffee?"

"Yep."

"Nothing else."

"Nope."

"Are we sure it's a date?"

Stepping on the breaks they stopped at this red light and Louis turned his head to Niall. "Really? You had to put that idea into my head so I'm even more freaked out!" He yelled as he pressed on the gas and went jerking Niall backwards into his seat as a little payback. He had been on edge since he got the message. He wasn't sure if he should respond back, or if he should leave it be.

He also hadn't been entirely sure it was a date or a meeting where Harry would tell him he was a pathetic parasite and never to speak to him. Both were possible and tied at a 50/50 draw. Thankfully working on the EP with the band and finalizing the tour, which he decides to manage since he trusted no one to do it right.

"It's a date," Louis told him again.

"Okay, well we get pizza, have a few beers find you an outfit, and finish  _Downton?_ " Niall asked as they pulled into the garage for the apartment building Louis lived in. "It's coffee so it shouldn't be to hard."

"Says the man who spent five hours for an outfit when you first took Jacqueline out. It could take all night, but I need to shower and shave."

"Damn, he is getting the classy as fuck Louis Tomlinson," he joked as Louis pulled his car into his spot, setting the car in park he turned the key off and got out. "Do you need me to spy? In case you know he tries to kill you?" Asked Niall as he got out of the car and opened the back door to grab his bag.

"Jesus no," Louis laughed shutting the car door and giving it a lock before they headed down through the lobby and to his flat. "I'm just... I talk with people all day for work but I get tongue tied with this man. It's sad."

"It's romantic," Niall corrected him as both men walked down the two flights of steps, there shoes clicking on the concrete. "He seems like a good guy Lou, the fact you have feelings for him is a big step."

"Yes, well Stan didn't scary me away from all men. When your 21, just got a job with a record label and are going to be on tour the last thing you think of is marriage."

"I remember it all to well," Niall reminded him as Louis held the door open and they walked through the lobby of the complex. "Evening Dan."

"Mr. Tomlinson, Mr. Horan," the new doorman said as Louis pressed the lift button.

"Louis and Niall, please I'm not that old," he corrected as there was a small ding and the doors opened pulling back into the side of the walls as Louis and Niall stepped in, Louis pressed 10, a few seconds later the door shut and they were making there way up. "But I'm older and I want it. I had my selfish years and not I'm ready to settle down."

"Says the man going back on tour."

"Two months and then I'm back," Louis corrected him as they reached the tenth floor, the doors opened and both men stepped out and made a left down the carpeted hallway. "They are painting the hallways this weekend so they said they were sort for the fumes," Louis said as a few painters were finishing up for the day, digging into his pocket Louis found his flat key.

"You had a hard time not going on tour and now you are going back out there. That's like an alcoholic going to a bar, or a druggie going to a crack house or-"

"I get the nice metaphors whatever you are tying to say Niall. It's two months and well I need to for them," insisted Louis as he turned the key and pushed his flat door open. "I have something to prove with them and I will be damned if Jeff fucks it up - I know you know how I feel about them, how I'm not treating them like a girl band. There are no prefabricated labels, they don't have a 'type' I just want them to make the best music they can and change the world. One soul at a time," Louis told him as he dropped his flat key into the basket next to the door and hung his bag on the hook on the grey walls.

"And that," Niall told him as he tied off his shoes, "is why you are so good at your job."

Louis smiled showing his teeth in a cheesy grin at Niall before he toed off his own shoes. Passing the kitchen he headed towards his bedroom but he knew Niall was standing there with his Irish puppy dog eyes. "There is a bowl of grapes in the fridge," he told him as Niall headed into the newly remodeled kitchen. He opened the stainless steel door to the fridge and was happy to see beer, but also there was fruit. "My mum was out and she still checks to see I eat more than crisps and Nutella," explained Louis as Niall held the bowl in his arm and pushed the door shut with his foot.

"But that is all that you eat," he joked popping a grape into his mouth.

"Oi! Shut it and help me," Louis said as he turned back on his heels and headed to his bedroom. Thankfully he had cleaned up this weekend, washed his sheets and even his towels. As usual the only place to sit in the room was the bed or floor so Niall opted for the bed. Sitting down he placed the bowl in his lap and braced himself for this hour of outfit searching. "Okay, it needs to be casual. But nice, so none of these," Louis said as he pushed open his closet door and nixed all the t-shirts he had in the dresser drawer. "I'm not going to work so none of these," he said pushing his business casual shirt to the side. His eyes traveled down to the pile of dirty clothes he should have washed last night but he decided to finish the final season of Hannibal.

"Whatever I wear I going to look old thanks to my damn glasses," Louis hissed. He had never been a fan of his glasses growing up, but now when he put them on it made him feel ancient and not 30. But him being the idiot he was scratched his eye when putting in a contact and now was punished to the black rectangle Ray-Ban frames to help him see.

"You look like a hip music producer you daft idiot," Niall corrected him as he popped two grapes in his mouth. "Why can't you wear a t-shirt? It's coffee."

"I need to look nice," explained Louis as he opened up a drawer and began to pull out different skinny jeans but not finding any that would work and just dropping them to the ground. "Why don't I have nice clothes!" He huffed out in frustration as he tried to slam the drawer shut but it got stuck. "Son of a bitch!"

Louis hand was twitching and his body was craving a smoke, but he was trying to quit. He never told anyone for then they would make a big deal about it, now he wished he hadn't flushed them all down the toilet. Closing his eyes Louis ran his hands down his face full of stubble and knew this was a bad idea.

"God, you are being like Oli, so dramatic here," Niall said setting the half eaten bowl of grapes on the bedside table, he got up and made his way over to Louis, stepping over the Mount Rushmore sized pile of black (some blue) skinny jeans he grabbed the first pair he saw, tossing them onto the bed he then reached up and grabbed the green army jacket and a simple white t-shirt. Bending down Niall grabbed Louis's lucky white chucks and set them with the outfit. "Done. Clean up and I'll order pizza."

Louis mimicked Niall as he picked up his jeans and shoved them back into the dresser. The outfit Niall had picked for him was good. Simple, put together, he could roll up the sleeves and show off his tattoos.  _It's a date Louis, it's just a simple date with coffee. Just a date._  He told himself as he felt his chest growing tight and his hands shook even more. "Fook it," he hissed as he lifted the mattress and grabbed the 'hidden' box of smokes. He had a lighter out on the balcony where he would go and decompress.

"Using your card to order," Niall called from the kitchen as Louis socked feet walked over the hardwood floors of his flat and into the kitchen. Niall had Louis's laptop up and running as he sat at the kitchen island with a beer. "I thought you were quitting," Niall said as his fingers moved over the keyboard. "It's been 2 weeks and I haven't seen you put the cancer stick in your mouth."

"Is this a guilt trip?"

"No," Niall said shaking his head as he began to type in Louis credit card numbers. "You smell better."

Grunting Louis tossed the carton into the bin before opened the fridge and grabbing a beer for himself. He hadn't been able to eat much from nerves so he knew he would be sending Niall home with the leftover food. "What did you order?"

"Pizza," Niall told him with a grin as his eyes stayed on the laptop screen. "So, you lot are just doing coffee? Or are you going to bring him back here and get a little frisky?"

"Shut up," Louis told him rolling his eyes as he took a drink of his beer. "It's coffee and then maybe lunch, or the cinema, or a walk, I don't know but I would very much like to get through coffee first."

"Okay, just curious," Niall said as he logged into Louis Plenty Of Fish profile, he had written his password down, being the good friend he is he never went on, until now. "So two things; one, why is he wearing a black shirt with white hearts and two, did you even discuss your height?"

"How do you know that and no. Why?" Louis asked as he leaned against the back set of counters and set his beer bottle down.

Niall smiled as he shut the laptop, folding his hands over he just smiled and looked at Louis. He was dead, so he wanted to enjoy the last few moments on earth.

"Niall...what the hell did you do?" Louis asked as he feared the worst of the words that were about to leave his best friends mouth. "Choose the words you are about to say carefully Niall James Horan, they could be your last." 

"In my defense," He began as Louis's jaw clenched and he knew he was fucked.  "I wrote your bio so this anger you are feeling is directed toward Oli and Jonah," Niall explained as Louis grabbed his laptop from him, opening it up he pulled up his profile. "I just now read your last message and was curious and then I looked at your profile and saw...."

"What the fooking hell I'm not 5'9!" Louis yelled. "You know Harry is actually close to 6 foot! I'm going to show up tomorrow and when he sees me I'll be fooking 5'6. Fook I can't go," Louis said as he set his laptop on the counter and shook his head. "It's a sign."

"Only to settle down," Niall told him. "Just say your friends lied and you're sorry." Louis narrowed his eyes at Niall in anger, he would have a nice talk with Oli and Jonah tomorrow. "You should be thanking us, if we never signed you up as a joke you never would have met Harry."

"You said I was 5'9, in what world am I 5'9?!?" Louis laughed shaking his head. "Like I'm not even close!"

"I think the 9 looked like a 6 in the eyes of drunk Oli," Niall admitted as he laughed. "I'm sure he won't mind, he seems smitten with you from what you have told me."

Louis couldn't help but smile, he was pretty smitten with Harry as well.

\---

_1 April 16:06_

"Bye Mr. Styles!" Angelica said as she was the last to leave his classroom. Harry have her a smile as her mother waved back at him. Turning around he had a few things to clean up in the classroom before leaving and then he had to keep himself occupied until tomorrow.

Tomorrow.

His heart lept for joy as he thought about it. He was finally meeting Louis, well meeting him in person Harry already knew Louis. While it was only six months they had been talking it seemed like years, which is what shocked Harry so much about the whole situation. He had talked to plenty of men on the app but never ever clicked like Louis. There was no work, every conversation was effortless.

Walking around the classroom Harry picked up the wrappers, some stray paper and made sure all the art supplies, reading books and such were out away.

"Knock, knock," came a voice and Harry knew it was Priscilla the TA for Mr. Schneider's Year 3 class , "hey."

"Hey Priscilla, I would love to chat but my mate is coming over for Thai food and we are talking about his stag party," Harry explained as his hands shook from nerves as he slipped the folders into his bag along with his iPad. "How did Tommy do today?"

"Better," she told him as she figitted with her hands. "Umm are you busy tomorrow I have this party that I have to go and I didn't want to go alone..." She asked trailing off.

"I wish I could," he said as he pushed up the sleeves of his jumped and her eyes grew wide as she saw the tattoos. "I have a date," he explained slinging the bag across his chest. Priscilla's face fell as Harry turned off the lights and headed out of his classroom. "I would have gone if I was free," he told her truthfully she was new to the school and Harry had a hard time fitting in with a lot of the older more seasoned teachers.

"Where are you taking her, on the date?" Priscilla asked as they walked towards the front of the school. "She must be lucky, all the teachers say you never date."

Harry bit the inside of his cheek and smiled. No, he kept his private life private at school, he knew how fast gossip press around with the students it was even faster among the teachers.

"Is she a teacher?"

"I'm taking  _him_  to The White Rabbit, and he is a music producer. Owner of Rover Records actually," Harry explained as her face fell. "Don't assume everyone's default sexuality is straight Priscilla," he told her with a smile. "See you Monday!" With that he turned, pushed the doors open and left the school as he felt the spring air in his lungs and was happy to see the faint rays of the sun in the sky. Harry's black boots clicked on the pavement as me made his way to the tube to get the train home. He hadn’t been lying when he said he had plans tonight, he also made these plans so the rest of the night would go by fast and he would wake up and it would be Saturday.

Harry felt like a kid about to go to Disney World for the first time. His stomach was full of butterflies, every time something reminded him of Louis he would smile and all he wanted to talk about was Louis, and his date. He had even called Gemma (even though it was 3:45 in the morning in New York) excited and slightly crying. He didn’t want to get ahead of himself, for he did that with his last boyfriend but Louis was… well he was Louis. He told it how it was, he was honest, and true to himself. He told Harry what he thought but never in a mean or down putting way. He was crushing hard and it was hard to keep it from his mum, but he was going to take things slow. See how coffee went, maybe they would see a film after, get food, spend all day doing tourist things in London. After tomorrow he would tell her and his step-father. But now, Louis was just his and the world had yet to say thing, influence them. It was still pure.

Scanning his train pass Harry walked through the turnstiles just making it to his train in time. Standing up Harry held onto the bar over his head as he kept to himself, he had wanted to message Louis so bad but he wanted to leave it where it was. Everything he wanted to talk to him about he wanted to do in person. From his favorite color, favorite smell, his days at Uni, his family, why he decided to let Harry in his heart, if he was going on tour, ask him if the wedding would be another date, say he would still go on Holiday with him, what his favorite song was in the world, talk about Glastonbury, learn more about his tattoos, and just sit and listen to him talk.

 _Keep it together Harry, maybe it won’t flow like it does when you talk online. Maybe it will be awkward, maybe you will be awkward, Louis could never be awkward, he deals with important people in the music industry as you talk with children five out of the seven days a week. Okay stop now you are just projecting and stop_. He said to himself as the train came to a stop and people got off and then some more filed on. He had been happy that his anxiety had been at bay until now. Breaking from his thoughts Harry headed over to the doors as they came up to his stop, the door opened and he filled on out of the car and headed back up to fresh air. Shoving his hands into his pockets he walked, his bag hitting him as it bounced off the side of his body as he made his way to his flat.

“Hurry up Harry, the food is getting cold,” Zayn said as he stood with the bag of Thai food in his hand. “You look chipper… did a student bring you an apple?”

“Funny, no, no student brought me an apple today,” Harry said as he unlocked the front door and Zayn walked in, making his way up the worn wooden steps to his flat. “No, if you must know Zayn Malik. I have a date tomorrow.”

“No,” Zayn said as Harry unlocked the flat door. “Is it fish boy?”

“His name is Louis,” Harry corrected him as he walked into his small single roomed flat. He set his bag on his kitchen table as he bent down and unzipping his boots and sliding them off his feet. “He has a good job, and he is different Zayn.”

“Oh, I know,” he laughed setting the takeaway down on the counter as he toed off his own trainers and hung his jacket on the back of a chair. “He is the one who sent you a cake for your birthday, along with that basket of things,” he pointed out to him. “So where are you taking him?”

“White Rabbit,” admitted Harry as he walked into the kitchen to get forks for their dinner.

“That is hollow ground, damn he must be important,” laughed Zayn as he walked over to the couch and coffee table. “I mean you never even brought…”

“No, but this is different,” he admitted as he grabbed two wine glasses and the half filled bottle from his fridge. “It’s hard to explain, but when I talk he listens to me, he wants to know about me and he cares,” Harry told him as he walked over and took his seat on the couch setting the glasses and bottle of wine down on the table. “It feels natural, our conversations and I’m crushing hard and I love this feeling.”

Popping the cork out of the bottle Harry poured each glasses as Zayn passed out the food. “I know, you have been all giddy, and bubbly and happy,” he explained to Harry as he pried off the lid and took the fork and began to eat. “I mean he offered to go to my wedding.”

“It was for the free booze,” Harry joked as Zayn kicked him in the leg, Harry pouted jokingly as he set his food in his lap and faced Zayn.

“I have it all planed out,” Zayn said to him between chews.

“Your stag?” Harry asked pointing a fork at Zayn who shook his head. “Oh, well I have shit.”

“You two go out on this date - what does he do again?” asked Zayn as Harry rolled his eyes at him and enjoyed his dinner, thankful he was able to eat.

“Okay, he is a music producer, for Rover Records,” Harry explained to him. “He is currently working close with this all girls band”-

“Like the Spice Girls?”

“Say that to him and he will cut you,” Harry explained to him his face stone cold serious. “No, it’s just a band and he has been in the studio with them, he is actually writing for them, and Ed Sheeran has done a single with them.”

Zayn’s mouth dropped open. “Seriously? Like you know you will be going to music parties and everything right Harry, like holy shit! This is mental! Wicked!” Zayn said as he set his food back on the coffee table, leaning forward he placed his hands on Harry’s knees and looked at him in the eyes. “This is not the average dentist you date this is like, god this is big!”

“Zayn, it’s not. He isn’t like that trust me he never throws out names of people he knows, and he is just Louis so please if you meet him….”

“If? You mean when,” corrected Zayn.

“You can’t act like this,” Harry said as he motioned around Zayn as he leaned back against the armrest of the couch. “I didn’t even know he was a big deal till Ed tweeted him and he tweeted back and there was banter. That’s when it hit,” explained Harry. “So back to the original topic, what is your plan?”

“Oh, well after the first date you two will have three more and then you will go back to his place and he will fuck so hard you black out-”

“Classy.”

“Always,” Zayn told him as he took a sip of his wine. “Then the next date he will let you top but that’s not your thing so you go back to bottoming. After the first week he will bring you home to meet his family, and sisters, then that same week you will in Cheshire to show him off to everyone you know. After a few weeks you will head to see Gemma, all before you go on your holiday that he was planning and then after that he will make a secret trip to Cheshire and ask your dad and mum for your hand and then he will have this amazing proposal for you are worth it, and then have a small wedding and within two years will have a kid,” Zayn said seriously as Harry smiled and wanted to tell him that he was mental but that sounded like the perfect life plan for him and Louis.

“It’s just a date,” Harry reminded him as he was reminding himself. He didn’t want to get ahead of himself. “I haven’t even told my mum, I just want. I don’t want to get ahead of myself.”

“I understand that,” he agreed. “But this time Harry, I think that you can get a bit excited - I’ve never seen you like this, and if this is what Louis does just over messages then I can’t wait to see how happy he makes you in person. I love you man like my brother and I want you to stay this happy and excited about life. Now, lets eat, you can prance around in your outfit for tomorrow and then we need to plan my stag party so I know the numbers to give you of mates that you don’t know.”

Harry nodded as Zayn told him more about the wedding and his mind trailed off a bit thinking about all that tomorrow was going to hold for him and Louis and a possible relationship that he had been aching for since the man first laughed at his dad jokes. He was holding out for hope for a future with Louis for he didn’t want this joy of a child to leave. Ever.

\---

_2 April 08:35_

Louis’s converse walked across the pavement as he made his way over to the coffee house, he had left his flat with enough time to arrive at the coffee house around 8:43. His hands played with the flat key in his pocket. He had checked his mobile and no message from Harry. He hadn’t canceled and he wasn’t going to look a fool walking into the coffee house. He hadn’t slept, he had tossed and turned all night long in his large king sized bed. He thought about getting out of bed and doing laundry, even getting some new clothes for work, start working on the tour schedule for the girls but he kept his mobile on silent and flipped over so he couldn’t see the screen. His entire body was throbbing from pain and he couldn’t help but yawn every few moments. But at the same time his chest was tight, he was wide awake and anxious to meet the man behind his phone screen.

Niall had been nice enough to send him a message that morning as a nice encouragement to smile, brush his teeth, and to buy condoms. Grateful for his friend he replied with a picture of his middle finger. Stopping at the crosswalk as the cars buzzed by Louis’s eyes looked over the sea of people, some were couples out for a walk on Saturday morning, some friends out for coffee and shopping, some people out walking their dogs, and singles out reading and enjoying the rare nice day. Taking a deep breath in he stood up a bit taller as he got the right away to walk. Walking with the group some turning right, others going left as he kept straight ahead.

 _You got this Louis. It’s coffee. Maybe a movie. Don’t get in your head, don’t let yourself make this something that it’s not. You like - no don’t lie to yourself Louis, you have done that long enough, you love him. Just take the door. he handed you a door take it and see where it leads. You just have to not fuck it up. Don’t fuck it up._  Louis told himself as his pace slowed down and he reached the coffee house. It was in a nice stand alone unit, there were flats over it, outside were a few tables and chairs as the window read ‘The White Rabbit’ the door was a dark faded wood, the handle was rod iron, he could guess that inside there was old couches, mix matched chairs, cups and coffee that was better than the standard stuff at Starbucks.

Two twenty something year olds walked past him as they talked about their Uni class. He stood frozen there. As soon as he walked through that door it changed. The relationship changed. It went from intangible to real emotions. It would be two people, not two phone screens that might get hurt in the end. Although, if he walked through those doors his life would be forever changed, Harry could be the one, the one who he settled down with, the one they raised a family with, the one he grew old with, shared a life with. The one.

 _Okay, don’t stand out here like a fooking wanker, go in_  Louis told himself taking his hands out of his pockets, clearing his throat, exhaling, his feet walking over the pavement, he stepped up the one step into the shop, his hand shook a bit as he placed it on the old handle, pushing the wooden door open a bell rang. His feet stepped on the wooden floors as his eyes found the most handsome man in the shop, sitting there at the table with two coffee mugs, and in his black shirt and white hearts. Harry stood up, his chair making a bit of a squeaking sound as he did.  _Walk_ , Louis reminded himself as he made his way towards Harry.

\---

_2 April 08:30_

Harry felt as if he was floating. He woke up at 6, took a nice shower washing his long hair (he needed it to get trimmed) and then getting ready in the shirt that Louis loved so much, he wasn’t sure if he should bring flowers, or homemade treats, but he just settled on himself. Clean, smelling good and ready to meet this man he was falling in love with and wasn’t sure if he should be at this point.

“Okay Harry, you got this just be you. As weird, and wacky and lame,” Harry told himself as he left his flat. Making sure that the door was locked before jogging down the faded wood steps and out the front door. The sun felt amazing on his skin as he took a right and headed to the coffee shop that he held as his sanctuary away from the world. He had never brought anyone here, Zayn had been once when he went on his own but Harry would come and just read, or do school work, and other times he would just sit there and watch those around him. But today, today he was sharing his sanctuary with Louis. Never once did he think this was a bad idea, this could be their sanctuary, they could come here after a long day and decompress, not even saying a word but both doing work, enjoying small secret smiles, a few games of footies.

 _Don’t think that far… but don’t stop this is you Harry. You think like this and to be honest he could be the one. The one, and the fact that he could be the one should be scary but it makes me so happy. So bloody happy that I want to sing like i’m in some musical. But don’t people will think you are mental, or some kind of art student._  Harry told himself as he shook his head as his boots clicked on the pavement. Zayn had sent a message telling Harry to let him know what happens and to keep him updated and if he needed to use the code word so he would know if Louis had killed him.

Which he knew that he wasn’t going to. If he would, maybe criminal minds would base an episode off of it. He had to look at the positives, right?

Walking around the corner Harry felt at home, his hand pushed the door open as the bell chimed Harry found the proper table for him and Louis, setting his jean jacket on the back of the chair he checked his mobile, Louis would be here within a few moments, so he headed over to the counter to order his drink and one for Louis.

“You normally don’t show your face here on a Saturday, what are you doing here?” Stacey asked as she wiped her hand on her blue apron.

“I… I umm have a date,” he told her with a shy smile. “So can I get two vanilla lattes with a shot of the caramel creamer please, no questions asked I’m nervous and I will let you know how it goes when he walks in and if we walk out together,” Harry told her as Stacey’s face lit up like a Christmas Tree.

“On the house,” she told him. “Go sit down and I will bring them over to you,” she said as Harry put his hands together and bent down a bit as a thank you to her. Walking back over to his table he took his seat and faced the door. Reaching into his jacket pocket he saw it was 8:42 and Louis should be here at any moment. Stacey walked over and set down the two mugs for Harry as she smiled at him and headed back behind the counter.

Harry took a deep breath in as he tapped on the table as the bell over the door rang and he looked up and saw the man who had stolen his heart standing there looking perfect. Pushing away from the table his chair squeaked a bit but he smiled, his lips unable to stop smiling as Louis walked towards him. Harry could hear his heart, he could feel his heart wanting to jump out of his chest as Louis walked over to him, his dirty white converse stood toe to toe with Harry’s black boots.

“Hi,” Louis said his voice a bit shaky as his lips curved into a smile and his blue-ish, green-ish blue eyes. He was far from 5’9 but he blamed that on his friends who made the profile. His voice sounded better than he had ever imagined.

“Hello,” Harry replied back. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that you all enjoyed the end of Swipe Right! Sorry it wasn't up yesterday it was a long day. I want to thank my best friend Jacq for even helping me in the fic I was writing for her (: I also want to thank my new friend musicluvr10 for being amazing and someone I'm really glad I found on twitter and tried to message her in the most non creepy way ever! 
> 
> These past ten chapters have been a lot of fun to write and so very different than what I normally do. And while, I know I was a little shit and ended it without ending it I want say that I will be doing a sequel to this. 10 Chapters again and in message format - why, well it was stated why it would be that way in the chapter (: I just had so much fun with this one I wanted to do another fun fluffy fic (maybe a bit more smut this time). 
> 
> Thank you for all the amazing comments, bookmarks, kudos and everything! You all are beautiful and amazing and I thank you so much!!!!!!! *hugs and kisses* 
> 
> XO  
> Vi

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is for my best friend Jacq for many reasons but the main one is that I love her and I wanted to give her something special & she gave me a lot of good ideas when she joined a dating app for a short time. Plus when I finished my last fic I needed something fun to follow that up with that was short and wouldn't take me 5+ months to write. 
> 
> The dating app I'm using this to base on is POV (plenty of fish). 
> 
> The story will be 10 parts and all but the final one will be messages via the dating app. The chapters will encompass more than a single day so watch for the dates that are posted with the conversations. 
> 
> All rights reserved. 
> 
> Comments and kudos are much loved 
> 
> XO  
> Vi


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